He has women friends, and it bother's me.

[shadowfax01]

Like others have said, he likes the attention and as a guy, I think he's keeping her around "just in case". If he was really into you and you were his number one priority he wouldn't feel the need to talk to her or put up with those kinds of comments. She obviously wants more from him and you need to set some boundaries about women. Those conversations are not ok.

[Hollyj]

One thing I love about him is that he tells me everything. Everything that goes on with this women. He hides nothing from me. Because I do trust him. It's her I don't trust. She's the one who's overstepping her boundaries because she's the one that cant control her feelings around him. He tells me he dodges her calls, or does not respond and that he could care less. I'm not worried about him. It's her im worried about and what it could do to our relationship. I've been through this once before with him from another women. I don't want to go through the same thing with her.

 

 

He is overstepping boundaries by remaining in contact with her. Period!

 

he loves the attention for this woman. , more than he cares for and respects you. This is a ridiculous situation, and I don't understand why you stick around, especially, since you barely know this guy. Think more of yourself.

 

I remember this. This is the guy who was talking sex with you before you had met. Have you met? We all advised that you ditch him. Here is another reason to move on.

 

"Were just friends and is already talking about having sex with me.

I'm gonna try to make this short as possible. Met a guy off a dating site. I knew him from before but never got the chance to have a phone conversation. Well he resurfaced again being gone for 9 months and now we talking on the phone and getting to know one another. I know sex is important because you need to see if you can full fill each other needs and see if there is a connection as far as physically. He asked me straight out if he could have sex with me when ever we see each other. ( Note were not in the same state, planning on meeting up near the future ) I said when the time comes and when it get's to that point and I said I would. For me it's important because I need to know if I'm able to please a man. We tried the phone sex because both of us are horny and have real high sex drive. And it was awesome both of us were satisfied. But at the same time I appreciate his honesty and coming forward and asking me this, but is this normal for 2 people that barley know anything about each other to talk about sex early on ? Please, don't tell me this guy just wants to get into my pants and have his way with me and take off. He's a good guy just talking for a couple of day's. I really like this guy & just hoping things work out. But could use opinions. Thanks !"

[coolgirl]

He is overstepping boundaries by remaining in contact with her. Period!

 

he loves the attention for this woman. , more than he cares for and respects you. This is a ridiculous situation, and I don't understand why you stick around, especially, since you barely know this guy. Think more of yourself.

 

I remember this. This is the guy who was talking sex with you before you had met. Have you met? We all advised that you ditch him. Here is another reason to move on.

 

"Were just friends and is already talking about having sex with me.

I'm gonna try to make this short as possible. Met a guy off a dating site. I knew him from before but never got the chance to have a phone conversation. Well he resurfaced again being gone for 9 months and now we talking on the phone and getting to know one another. I know sex is important because you need to see if you can full fill each other needs and see if there is a connection as far as physically. He asked me straight out if he could have sex with me when ever we see each other. ( Note were not in the same state, planning on meeting up near the future ) I said when the time comes and when it get's to that point and I said I would. For me it's important because I need to know if I'm able to please a man. We tried the phone sex because both of us are horny and have real high sex drive. And it was awesome both of us were satisfied. But at the same time I appreciate his honesty and coming forward and asking me this, but is this normal for 2 people that barley know anything about each other to talk about sex early on ? Please, don't tell me this guy just wants to get into my pants and have his way with me and take off. He's a good guy just talking for a couple of day's. I really like this guy & just hoping things work out. But could use opinions. Thanks !"

 

This is someone else hun. I got rid of the previous one along time ago. When I ended things with the previous one I met my current boyfriend a couple of months later after I ended things with the previous one. I guess what I'm saying is that it's not fair to me, or our relationship period. Like i mentioned this is new for the both of us and we have hit a few bumps on the road and now that we finally have found a common ground and getting along I don't want anything or anyone to mess it up and this worries me alot actually. This situation had happened with another women prior to this one while I was with him, and he took care of the mess and told him if your willing to jeaprodize our relationship by keeping in contact with this women who's married then I'm not in it. I told him he needs to tell her husband what's going on. He has the right to know. It's not about runinig or destroying someone's marriage it's about who's he married too. He's like I'm not the type of person to destroy someone else's marriage. So I told him so it's okay with you to screw up our relationship because of this. He apologized to me so many times. And now that finally we have some peace and getting along for the first time in a long time and both have found common ground now have to deal with another one. This lady is in her 50's whom she has 2 kids with an ex husband. I'm so frustrated with him and her at the same time. I just want to tell her your in your's 50's grow up and stop messin with people's lives, because honestly she doesn't care who she hurts. I have no fond respect for her what so ever. I don't trust her period.

[Hollyj]

Your anger should be at your bf. There is no reason why he should be communicating with her.

 

Have you met this guy?

[Andrina]

You're not listening. A guy I'd been friends with (group friend, not a close friend) when I was a teen wanted to be Facebook friends with me. When he messaged me something stupid about touching my leg when we were in a hot tub (with a group of people) when we were teens, I deleted him as a Facebook friend. I'm married and will not be friends on any level with a guy who would talk to me like that, and I don't need an inappropriate ego boost.

 

A guy who lets an "acquaintance" message him all day long and all hours of the night, is getting something from the "friendship," and it's not anything innocent. Every moment of his emotional energy and thoughts communicating with her is time that he should be spending on you or other ethical activities. He doesn't care that you're upset she has a crush on him. To him, women are disposable possessions. Hasn't he already shown you his ethics by engaging with a married woman in the past? An emotionally healthy, mature, ethically sound man wouldn't engage his precious time with a married woman. He'd have boundaries. He quit the behavior because you asked? So what. The fact he did it in the first place shows you what kind of sick mind he has.

 

That lady you don't know? She has no allegiance to you. You're angry at the wrong person. He's the one who's supposed to be loyal to you and possess normal boundaries. If you think this is your dream man, you have a lot of work to do on your self worth.

[itstheshrink]

Is it too indiscrete to ask what is this overly affectionate friend's nationality?

 

Just saying... my boyfriend is Mexican. He has this Mexican friend, she's a girl, and they don't see each other often. However, when they do, it makes me uncomfortable because she yells that she loves him, calls him 'my dear' all the time and squeezes the crap out of him.

In 3 years, since the 2 of us got together, I have come to realize that what sounded as one of his excuses at the time was actually a legit excuse. That is, well, Mexican girls tend to act that way. Not all of them, of course, but it's not uncommon. Still bothers me, but it happens so rarely that they meet, that I have decided to pick my battles and ignore it.

Oh, and at some point she left to another country for 6 months ans thought it was a good idea to leave him a little present, giftwrapped, with a note featuring a lot of carefully drawn hearts, and the words 'te quiero mucho' (I love you a lot). Oh well. I call it 'lack of common decency', he calls it 'cultural differences'... whatever it is, make sure he knows it bothers you.

[TheLastofUs]

I have an old ex that has now been my very good friend for 6 years now. He used to confess that he missed me all the time and wanted me back. But now that I have a boyfriend, I don't think it's ok for my ex to be talking to me like that. He needed to move on and respect my relationship otherwise I'd have to respect my partner and stop talking to my ex. If your partner is trustworthy, he will make sure she doesn't over step those boundaries and shut it down. If not, he's not really respecting you. I understand if he feels bad for her, but that's still no excuse. I felt bad for my ex, yet I still had to let him know he couldn't keep talking the way he was.

And if your partner isn't trustworthy...well then at least you'll find out who he actually wants to be with and you won't have to waste your time anymore.

It's good that your partner reassures you that you are his priority. I think it's fair of you to ask him to at least to the girl to respect your relationship anytime she steps out of line.

As long as she keeps telling him that she misses him and don't think you call ALL be friends. Not until she backs off. Otherwise she's just trying to steal him. And that's no friend of yours...

[ecaryn]

How old are you guys?

 

You say you've been seeing each other for just a month?

 

Seems to me, you may be a bit premature in assuming the exclusivity of your relationship. This guy just met you, from a dating site, where he also recently met other women whom he's talking to as well. I think he's just continuing to consider his options. Whether he's being up front and honest with you about that is another question.

 

Bottom line is this... She is not his friend. They are potential romantic interests for each other, that's what dating sites are about. The only thing you can do and should do is set boundaries for yourself. If you feel you want this relationship to be exclusive, then you need to tell him his ongoing communication with this woman, or any woman from dating sites, makes you uncomfortable and questions his commitment to your relationship. If he say's he's not ready for commitment (or behaves in such a way) then that's fine but you'll make the best decisions for yourself from then on out, regardless of his place in your life or not.