Olivia's Moving on Journal

[Butterflyxx]

It's been 46 days since we broke up.

I personally am feeling a lot better about the situation, but sometimes my mind wanders back to you and it hurts all over again.

By hurt, I mean my mind mainly wanders to the future. I will never know where your life will take you, I won't know what university you're going to, I won't be apart of your future.

That's the part I'm finding the most difficult.

In 4 months you'll be leaving school, and you'll completely leave.

It makes me sad thinking about it, so I try my best to not think about the future, and to understand that it's a part of life.

One day I'll be over you, and I praise that day. For the time being, it's going to hurt everyday.

 

It kills knowing I'm not apart of your life. Not so long ago I was, and now I'm a complete stranger

[Butterflyxx]

I saw him today and he completely ignored me. He got out of being anywhere near me.

His friend asked me why we don't talk anymore and I said I don't see the need to nor do I want to.

Feeling emotional.

Once upon a time I could talk to him as normal but now it's like I'm a stranger.

I miss him badly.

[Butterflyxx]

Yesterday I was walking home and he drove past. He couldn't keep his eyes off me, staring right at me. I obviously looked in the and realised it was him. It felt like hours that passed. I can't get the way he looked at me out of my head, usually if I walked past him he'd have ignored me. I think he only stared at me because it was a shock to see one another outside of school.

I woke up today and I feel upset and anxious. It feels like I'm back at square one. My mind keeps telling me he's found someone else.

I'm disappointed in myself because I was doing okay but now that happened, I'm not.