Girls becoming nicer

[traz]

hey all

 

This thread is basically to talk about a trend that I've noticed, and maybe discuss it a bit. There have been several times where I have asked a girl out or somehow let her know my feelings for her, only to have her say that she only thinks of me as a friend. Ok, I can deal with that. But in each instance so far, or practically, the girl has become noticably friendlier, more talkative, and more flirty with me, after she knows that I like her. If I didn't know better, each time I would have guessed that the girl DID like me, but I know it can't be true, because they told me that they didn't. And given that they knew I liked them, they would have said something to me if they developed feelings...I would assume lol.

 

Anyhow, I was wondering if anyone here has seen that kind a trend...where once a girl finds out that you like her, she pays alot more attention to you and puts alot of effort to keep talking to you, even though she doesn't like you back. In a way, I've always felt its like teasing. If a girl told me that she liked me and I didn't return the feelings, I wouldn't flirt with her more, in fact, I'd probably make an effort to talk with her a little less. Not because I'm mean, but because I didn't want to lead her on...I wouldn't want her to get the wrong idea. But all the girls I've noticed, thats exactly what they seem to do. It's also interesting to note that in a few of these instances, about 2 or 3 of the girls, they've had boyfriends while knowing that I liked them, but still flirted pretty blatantly. And no, its not my imagination heh.

 

Is it just my experiences? Have any other guys had this happen? Can any girls maybe offer an explanation? Maybe girls are just naturally teasing witches

[Bjourne]

She is nice to you of the exact same reason that rock artists are nice to their fans. She knows that you like her and thereforeeee she wants to have you around, because her knowledge of your feelings make herself feel good. She is not flirting with you, only teasing you so that you will reveal that you are interested in her and she will feel appreciated. Guys do it too.

[Double J]

This has happened to me in the past, and I can honestly say that I've done it too. When I found out this good friend of mine liked me, I started acting friendlier with her despite not "liking her that way." Back when I was a freshman in high school, I liked this girl a lot.. When I told her, she said she was not interested but suddenly seemed friendlier and more interested in having more conversations.

 

I guess people do this because they want what the other person is feeling to remain intact - it makes us feel good about ourselves. If one day we're feeling a bit lonely and need some attention, we know that the person who likes us is willing to give us the time of day. It also sets us at ease with the other person and makes us comfortable in joking with them and what not.