Change my personality??

[finittz]

well...im the quiet type of guy...hanging out wit friends, laughing at their jokes and once in a blue moon throwing in mine...

there a couple of girls i talk to if an opportunity comes up..but otherwise i just sit there...while my other friend pokes them, always making jokes about them and bothering them, now to me it would seem like it bothers them, but he still makes them laugh and i get the feeling that even though he acts like a 10yr old kid...girls like it when he bothers them...

 

so in general do girls like it when they are bothered, poked, tapping them then turning away? Also since im the kind of guy who just sits there, and laughs at jokes they make once in a while...should i change my attitude..start bugging them more and acting a bit more stupid???

[FuriousSam]

Don't change yourself if you think that will help you get girls because it won't. Change yourself because you want to change for yourself. And you said that you are a quiet type, so while you are on the street next time say hi to some cute girls. You don't have to say anything, just hi and a smile. Keep doing that and after a while, you will be comfortable talking to people.

 

You asked if girls likes to be bothered by someone that you think is acting like a 10 year old? Well, put yourself in their shoes. Do you like some girl that comes up to you and pokes fun at you and have fun with you or do you like the one that just sits there and do nothing?

[Inconceivable]

Don't change yourself just to get girls. Change yourself because you want to. I used to be just like that, I was quiet and rarely talked. But one day I decided I didn't want to be like that anymore. I wanted more friends and I wanted to let people know what I thought. I changed because I wanted to...That's what you have to ask yourself---Do I want to change for myself or just to get a girl? Because if it's just to get a girl, you're doing it for the wrong reasons.

 

Good Luck!

 

[justagirl20f]

Ack! No, definitely don't change your approach. TRUST ME, in a few very short years, you're gonna be the one all the girls get intrigued by, and he's gonna be the one they roll their eyes at and laugh at behind his back (as in "can you believe what that loser did to try and pick me up?!")

 

The problem is, he's learning that girls like to be poked and prodded and teased and maybe at your age now they do. But his approach isn't gonna get him very far with girls in the future, and because of his early learning he is going to find it very difficult to change his approach later on.

 

For goodness sake, don't become irritating just because it gets their attention. Remember, negative attention is still attention. I guess it depends on what kind of attention you're looking for.

[Double J]

I think girls like to be teased once in a while, but not in a childish way. You see, busting on girls (especially the really hot ones) conveys that you could have fun with her and you don't really care what she thinks about you. There's also something about touching (sometimes called kino) that for some reason seems to make a girl more inclined to view you as "more than friend" material. I don't mean touching in a sexually threatening way, but very subtle. Still, nothing attracts girls more than confidence.

[fantasia2004]

change for you no one else and they will come

[odysseus77]

Im not sure I believe in the 10 year old approach...if its flirtatious, and depending on the girl you do it to, then it can be good...its definitely better than just sitting there though...Absolutely you should change your personality...romance is a game, and if you ain't playin, you can't win. People who say, you're fine the way you are, just really aint got any better advice...here's mine...if you dont want to meet girls and talk to them, then stay the same and wish that someone will come along...but if you go out and play the game, you will meet lots of girls. I know this first hand. I used to be the very shy guy, I had a girl friend for 2 and a half years, then she tore me in half. I went 6 months of being myself without much luck...then i changed my appearance, and aura about me, and now my only problem is choosing one (which is a big problem though cause none really seem to fit me for a realtionship)....any questions pm me

[mehr als Mensch]

Don't go changing who you are because you want something. First of all, you said it yourself, those girls are immature. Changing who you are is just going to attract those same shallow people. If you want girls that you can respect and vice versa, then I suggest that you become who you are. Don't care what other people think about you either. Just be confident, assertive, and comfortable with who you are, and you won't regret it.

[fantasia2004]

you cannot change your personality just some things about you you did not do before anymore.

[SkyFire]

you cannot change your peronality just some things about you you did not do before anymore.

 

Wrong. You can change your personality. I went from being a shy and scared of people to being very social.

 

Change your person into the person you WANT to be.

 

When in doubt or facing a problem, act what your best self would have done. Would your best self be shy?

 

There ya go. Shyness can be overcome.

 

PM me if you need help bro.

[fantasia2004]

do not change the things that make you who you are just the characteristics things that need a little tweeking.

 

That is what I mean.

[ShySoul]

Its not changing your person so much as embracing your person and fully becoming the person you've always been. As a really shy person I've learned that shyness isn't something to overcome its something to embrace. By recognizing that I am shy, that's just me and that there is nothing wrong with me, I gained more confidence in myself. I realized that I was fine the way I was and that I didn't need to change for anyone. In doing so my improved confidence showed through and I was better able to face a given situation. Its not overcoming shyness, its knowing when to stand up for yourself and having the confidence to do it instead of using the shyness as an excuse.