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No Contact guidelines


Bridger1

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Some great advice on here and seems so many are going through the same thing as I.. The whole No Contact thing is hard for me to grasp. Whats your methods, guidelines.. and such. She has cheated, lied, used me.. yet we talk it out.. first says she loves me but not in love with me. One time im her best friend... then next day ( or even the same day) she loves me with all her heart and wants me to come cuddle and kiss her. .. says she wants daily contact, all day every day.. so i do.. she gets distant.. if i back off or dont say i love you.. shes hurt and asks why. My head is telling me I have to go NC.. but my heart wont allow it... YES I KNOW shes not good and i cant trust her right now with all that has happened.. for some reason and i dont know why.. i cant let her go.. i get nauseous with worry and hurt waiting to hear from her, wondering who she is with, what she is doing... but does one have to be in the right place to put in NC.. if so how does one know when they are ready.. ????

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Your self worth and higher standards should make you want to leave her in the past and forget about her. Easier said than done but this girl has done a lot of really bad things to you. IMO its a reflection on how you feel about yourself and what you deserve.

 

IMO, go NC forever

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You have to find the strength to let go of this person. No good person would play the games she is playing with you. You are addicted to the idea of the relationship that no longer exists, and you are giving her the best of both worlds in terms of her having you still in her life but not completely absent to feed her massive ego.

 

No contact is difficult but you need to redirect your focus on yourself now. Start getting those "happy hormones" by exercising, doing things you haven't done in a long time, or try new hobbies and generate interest in new things. Block her number, take away any avenue she may be able to contact you. That is the only way to succeed at no contact.

 

The poster above wrote go NC forever.

 

I concur.

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Why do you choose to engage with a person that clearly showed you with ACTION that they have 0 respect, are untrustworthy and cheat?

 

Not healthy, and you stay on this road and accept a LIFETIME of misery and depression (among many other things).

 

"Whether you think you can or whether you think you can't, you are right" - Henry Ford

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