What to do...

[Aceism]

Hey guys. So here's my story:

 

I met this girl a few months ago on a feature film set (I was the producer on this by the way). We spent a lot of time together working and I grew to know her even more. Afterwards, I hired her again for another movie because she was very efficient. During that time we bonded really well--discovered that we both love surfing and made plans to surf after the movies were done. I felt like we clicked, but at the same time, I don't know if she was being pleasant to me because I'm her boss. Also at the same time, I wanted to keep my professionalism, so I didn't pursue her as hard.

 

After the films both finished, I met up with her again and hung out. We bonded again and flirted, but at the same time, I still can't seem to read her--I don't know if she's keeping her distance because I'm her boss and she wants to keep the professional relationship, or if she really likes me.

 

She agreed to hang out again and surf this week. But I don't know if I should finally tell her this time that I have feelings for her. Or to do it over a text message. The thing is, she lives pretty far from me so I have to drive down to see her, and financially and logistically it's tough for me at this point.

 

I've talked to a bunch of friends and they've all agreed that I should finally tell her how I feel, so I can get an answer one way or another, and move on if she doesn't like me. Thing is, should I save myself some time and do it over a text, or do it in person? I feel very strongly about her but it's so up in the air about whether she likes me or not. At times, I feel like she really does, and at other times, she sees me as her boss, and constantly calls me--in a half-joking manner "Mr. Producer."

 

ugh. What to do?

[Coldarmy13]

If youre going to tell her, DONT do it in text. At the very least give her a call. Preferably in person.

[Movingforward3]

You need to tell her face to face. But, why the rush? Why not continue to hang out surfing and let the relationship grow to where you can ask her out to dinner?

[SophieGrace]

You are jumping the gun kohai... you sound like a girl (and I am one, so I know that voice): "I must rush to clarify things even though we haven't even had a real date just hung out a couple times but once I was her boss and I have crazy feelings so must interpret everything to extreme degree when no interpretation is present and must take action even though I don't know what to do, etc.."

 

Relax. Go surfing. Who the f cares. The job is over. Let it play out. If you feel like talking about your feelings in the moment, then do. If you don't, just enjoy the interaction. She is flirting with you when she says "Mr. Producer." You have the upper hand. Stop obsessing.

[gaseousclay]

Texting is impersonal. Tell her in person how you feel