Is ha mad

[Palmbaby]

I've posted here before 'under 2 commitment phobics one big mess' but now something new has happened and I'm completely confused by it.

After splitting up in October and keeping in touch by text mostly, I sent a jolly text last night telling the ex I'd crashed the car, well I got an instant reponse 'couldn't have been your fault you're too good a driver' then he said he was all alone so he'd gone out for a beer and some company, his half star hotel had no clients (a private joke about his flat) but he had a booking for 4 April!!!!!!! WHAT????

I know he's got other 'friends' and one of them has visited since we split, He's asked me when I'll go over there again but I've told him I won't if he wants to be free to be with other women. That's why I ended it in October.

What I can't understand is why he's telling me this. Is it to punish me for refusing to go and see him on his terms, to make me jealous, to show me he can manage without me. I don't know and it's driving me mad. I want to ring him and scream at him but I won't, I want to write an angry letter but I don't know if it'll do any good.I want us to sort things out but we're both too frightened to move forward and we've been stuck in this limbo Help

[GettingOverIt]

Sounds to me like he knows exactly which buttons to push and exactly how to push them.... He has you fuming, all the while he may be smugly sitting back in his 'half star hotel.'

 

I'm sorry, but it doesn't sound like he's frightened of anything... He is having his way with your heart and feelings and you are suffering for it....

[ajk]

don't talk to him! i hope you didn't respond to his text back to you. that's very inconsiderate of him to tell you he has a 'booking' coming up. if you broke up with him for that reason and he's still like that, why try to work things out? if he hasn't given you an indication that he's willing to work on things, it isn't worth what it is doing to you to stay in touch with him.

[Palmbaby]

Thanks for your replies, since I wrote this I've scraped myself off the ceiling, deleted all his soppy text messages, and sat crying in frustration.

I know he's messing with my heart, I know I've been trying to do the same to him, not by making him jealous, that's his tactic, but by telling him I miss him (I do) but I won't come and see him unless he gives up this other woman business.

Well I did respond, I said well nothing has changed so I must forget you, we were happy, is this what you really want? Now I'm beginning to think this was his attempt to get me to come over before April. I'm tempted to say to him, look if I come over again will you cancel whoever it is in April? If he says no then I have confirmation that he means what he says and I can let go.

Or should I leave it as it is, it's not like I haven't made my case clear.

Oh God this is so horrible, I feel like I've cut off a limb.

[mt_joy]

Get over him. He doesn't deserve you. Find someone that will treat you a lot better!