It still doesn't feel real.

[Seraphim]

I don't really have hope anymore. I do still think about him and the relationship a lot, but I'm not looking at those texts as him rethinking anything. I just think its weird as the dumper that has already moved on to attempt small talk with me. I didn't, but it made me want to ask if his new girlfriend knows he's asking about life in my new place or my weekend

 

The thing is you cannot get over somebody if they are texting you and acting all" friendsy". That doesn't work when you're wild about somebody and you have to get over them. I would block his text and just go on with life.

[Tanzi]

As has already been said it has only been two months. That is no time at all. Plus if you have only recently found out he is seeing someone else then it will set you back some. On top of that you are still living together. There is no way on earth you are going to move on from someone you are still living with. How can you stop thinking about someone whose face you see everyday? How are you going to stop analysing every little thing they do and say when you are there watching and hearing every little thing they do and say.

 

The reason it doesn't feel real is because it hasn't been made real yet.

 

I can actually relate to this as I have been in a very similar situation. My ex-husband didn't move out until a good few weeks after he decided he wanted to end our marriage. In that time I found out he was seeing someone else. He more or less told me (tried to pretend they had met after we split) because he couldn't help himself but talk about her. I had been handling the split quite well at that point but when I found out about the OW I quickly spiralled downwards. He moved out not long after that. What I can say is that living under the same roof as him .... while despising every bone in his body .... was not helping the situation and it certainly wasn't helping me accept reality and thus move on.

 

When you finally move out you will be able to start moving on properly. You can't grieve a relationship when a part of you still feels like you are in it. You need your own breathing space and a place where you can start creating a new life.

[snoopygal]

I did move out, I mentioned that a few posts ago. I've just been posting on the same thread.

[snoopygal]

I guess I wasn't looking for advice on his comments, I was just venting. I've only been living my "new life" outside of his home for about a week now. In many ways I am relieved. In many other ways, I feel like he just broke up with me. Although I have my ups and downs, and still miss and think about him constantly, it's not all good anymore. In addition to missing the good times, and wanting him back I'm starting to remember times that he hurt me and times that he wasn't putting any effort in. No one is perfect, and he certainly had his flaws too, but especially since the breakup, I had put him on a pedestal. It's like for a couple months I forgot that I had feelings that mattered too. Honestly, the messages he's sending are a little irritating. When I see them now, I'm not analyzing them into hope anymore. I'm getting angry because he has a girlfriend. He chose not to be with me anymore. He avoided me awkwardly for the last few weeks. Why does he think it's ok to text me in a friendly manner? What makes him think he has the right to expect me to want to have small talk with him.