king1 Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 so guys I've been recently talking to this girl that I just meant and she has a baby. no I was asking her if she was to find someone else how will her and her ex-boyfriend we're going to co parent. she told me if she decides to move on that she told him he's just going to have to accept it. now my first question to her was so you haven't decided yet and she told me I'm not trying to be with anyone else right now but whatever is supposed to happen will happen it may not happen now or a few months from now but it will happen that's whathat is confusing me. so my question is I no she doesn't want a relationship now but when she says if its meant to happen it will happen does this mean if she chooses to get into another relationship that will happen or does it mean if she decides to get back with her kids father that's also a possibility the reason I ask this is because when I asked her so you haven't decided yet if you're basically going to be with your kids father and not and she told me if it's meant to happen it'll happen I don't know I'm pretty sure that's what she needs but your advice would be helpful thanks ladies gentleman. Link to comment
mhowe Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 She is giving you the "soft" not interested. I don't see how her co-parenting decisions are any of your business. Link to comment
Whitecoco Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 She doesn't know what she wants. Let her make up her mind but also tell her where you stand for your peace of mind. Link to comment
king1 Posted March 23, 2015 Author Share Posted March 23, 2015 you guys are right but the only reason I ask about the co parenting was because she sounds interested but she says she just doesn't wanna waste her time or my time so she at the moment she's looking at it as there's nothing wrong with a little friendly conversation but at the same time she's flirting too because I asked for her number and she said not yet hun you have to earn that so I don't know. Ilike I said guys she sounds interested I talk to her every night she flirts I flirt back but my main concern is she said if it's meant to happen it will happen and I just don't know if I'm wasting my time because if you're saying you're not looking for a relationshipnow for a couple months from now but then you're also saying there may be a possibility I'm going to be with my kids while but then if that's the case why even pursue something new Link to comment
mhowe Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 You need to HEAR her --- she doesn't want to date you but sees nothing wrong with friendly conversation. You asked for her number and she said no. HER mind is made up ---- she isn't interested. You aren't even dating!!!! So I find it very forward to ask about her "co-parenting". You really need to use the period and not write run on sentences. It makes your post very difficult to read. Link to comment
king1 Posted March 23, 2015 Author Share Posted March 23, 2015 like I said guys thank you she told me she was interested but she didn't want to waste her time. she proceeded to tell me about her ex boyfriend and everything she's going through. I asked her if she was to move on how was she going to co parent. she told me that if she decided to move on in the future he was going to have to deal with it point blank I ask her so you haven't decided yet and her word for word answer was I'm not trying to be with anyone else right now but whatever is supposed to happen will happen. it may not happen now or a few months from now but eventually it will. like I said the guys pretty much she said her mind is not made up she's confused she doesn't even know what she wants. I took it as her saying she doesn't know what she wants and if her and her baby father gets back together and that's how it happened that's how it happens. or if she decides to move on she decides to move on so you guys pretty much answered the question for me she trying to figure out what she wants she doesn't know what she wants the question I was asking you guys was if there's a possibility of her being with her kids father based on what she said. so pretty much would I be wasting my time within the next couple of monthsbody now or within the next couple of months because at the same time she also said she wasn't looking for a relationship anytime soon she just wanted to be friends but why flirt I don't know thank you Link to comment
mhowe Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 If she is undecided that means she hasn't made up her mind and not making up her mind means, in essence that the answer to you is actually no and while I know that isn't what you want to hear it is the hard, cold truth because if she wanted to be with you she would be and she isn't so that means that she would rather leave the door open to get back with her baby daddy and after all that would be the best thing for everyone involved except you of course LOL> Link to comment
bulletproof Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 I asked for her number and she said not yet hun you have to earn that so I don't know. Honestly, all the other stuff aside, I wouldn't want to date someone who said this to me. It's kind of condescending and patronizing, in my opinion. You have to "earn" it? Come on. She's actually objectifying herself. I say move on. Link to comment
king1 Posted March 23, 2015 Author Share Posted March 23, 2015 Guys I should have mentioned she is pregnant with the baby now and hasn't had it yet and there not together Link to comment
mhowe Posted March 23, 2015 Share Posted March 23, 2015 They will be part of each others life for years to come. Link to comment
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