I'd like to have your opinion on this...

[LoveSoDeep]

Exactly and where does the Op say that he pushed for more? Sorry if I missed it.

 

"as we kissed gently, I sensed that she froze. I backed up a bit, she remained her eyes closed, and I kissed her more. I tried to lean back and bring her close to me, but she resisted. Eventually, she did lean on mean to cuddle, so I held her in my arms for several minutes, stroking her hair and talking softly."

 

I think this is where to me it seemed he pushed it a little. He tried to bring her in closer and she resisted.....then it seemed like he was just waiting for her to come in closer and she finally gave in. I just felt like the way the OP was talking about his expectations that there was a pretty good chance he had tried for more....because he seems to have wanted and expected more. I could be way off base.

 

The OP is the only person who could shed light on this and he's free to call me and tell me I'm wrong.

[Tanzi]

Thank you everyone for all your answers! I appreciate it. However, it was quite hard for me to judge because I am not a mind-reader (wish I was). I could only look at her body language. The problem is: if you rush and she wants it, then 100% alright!!! If not, you scare her. It's really hard to decide. It's almost random.

 

Whether she wants it or not there is still nothing wrong with NOT rushing. And if she wants more than just sex (as she said), then NOT having sex wouldn't be a problem. Besides, she was the one to back away. What more could you do?

 

No-one is a mind-reader so we are all in the same boat! Nevertheless, judging by her reaction it seemed she didn't want to go any further. Either she had a change of heart or the kiss was just meant to be a kiss but she realised you saw it a green light to much more.

[LoveSoDeep]

Thank you everyone for all your answers! I appreciate it. However, it was quite hard for me to judge because I am not a mind-reader (wish I was). I could only look at her body language. The problem is: if you rush and she wants it, then 100% alright!!! If not, you scare her. It's really hard to decide. It's almost random.

 

Good point. No one is a mind reader and she shouldn't expect you to be.

 

Personally, never fault a guy for trying. How else is he going to know where I stand - other than asking I guess but that can be awkward "do you mind if I place my hand on you___?"...yeah that would get weird - Here's the thing though if I back away from something i'm totally fine if they guy goes back to whatever we had been doing before but I would be a little put off if he pushed again soon after (or within the same sitting I guess). Then as time goes on either he'll try it again or I'll make the move and as long as he respects my wishes in the moment I'm fine with that. So I'm not asking anyone to read my mind....just following my physical cues which I make very obvious. If my cues are vague that's my problem.

[SoulTaker]

I've used a kiss to determine if I want to continue to see someone...some guys have been nice guys, and the kiss either seals it so I'm totally into him, or I drop him. It's only been three dates...try not to get too invested for a while in dating...because dating is a process of determining potential

 

I agree. Men don't realize that some women will place an emphasis on kissing. It can be a deal breaker for a woman, while most men don't think much about it.

 

With that said, there were probably other factors involved (that added up). A woman will not make a decision on just a kiss, if the guy has more areas going for him (e.g. good looks). If she sees him as a keeper, she'll teach him the art of kissing.