I finally did it. Feel so guilty.

[ifeeltrapped]

Well, I did it. I broke up with him. Last night I came home from work and I was ready to do it, but when I got there he was bawling his eyes out because his Grandpa died. I immediately hugged him and tried to sooth him, and thought to myself that I can breakup with him later when he's not already having a rough time. He said he was going to go be with his family (which, is understandable in any normal family, but his is farrrr from that, I heard him mention this grandpa maybe once in the last year). I said ok, I'll drive you. And he said no you have to work tomorrow, so I said ok I'll follow you there and drive to work from there in the morning, I want to be there for you. He then said he needed to be alone for a bit so I went inside while he sat in his truck. I came back out 30 min later to check on him, and the truck doors were locked and he was on the phone, with his friend (one that does drugs, I'm positive). Then, my soft spot for him over his grandpa cancelled out (maybe I'm a bad person?) and I told him if he left and didn't let me go be there for him then take his stuff and don't come back. He then said I was selfish and being mean and I should be more understanding of his grandfathers passing. In my opinion, I was being more than understanding by wanting to go with him? My instincts kicked in though, that he wasn't going to spend the night with his family, he wanted to go get high with his friend first, otherwise he wouldn't have locked the doors while he was on the phone, right? Anyways, he went and packed all his stuff up, crying the whole way saying he doesn't understand why I'm making him do this, I said no you're choosing it. He said I want to come home tomorrow and I said no if you leave you're gone for good. He still chose to leave, even though he kept insisting it was only for a night. no. I have to be strong, right? idk!!!!! ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Now he's texting me this morning that he can't make it without me, etc. but last night he could?????

[MisUnderstood9]

ignore the text messages and block his number if you need too.

 

I am sorry for his grandfathers passing but, he choose to leave and pack his things. You gave him the choice and from what you've said about the drugs in your other posts I agree with you it was because he wanted to go to his friends and get stoned.

 

He made his choice, let him deal with it. Be strong.

[greta96]

Good for you for doing it!!!

No, you are not a bad person, and no, you don't need to feel guilty.

The only thing this dude has said that sounds true is that he can't make it without you. Of course losing you means losing the roof above his head, and his truck, food, money for buying drugs, and who knows what else he was using you for.

Prepare to receive desperate calls from his mother, and be guilt tripped to exhaustion. His mother doesn't want to have to deal with him and support him, you basically took him off her hands...

 

All you have left to do now is stay strong. You have no idea how much your life will improve without the deadbeat. Financial freedom is a big deal. If I were you, I would now block him and his family from calling my phone, I would pack the rest of his belongings and have them sent to his mother, and if he shows up on your doorstep, I'd tell him I'm calling the police.

 

Stay strong, you did the best thing you could have done for you and your family.

[DancingFool]

Look you absolutely did the right thing. For him to even have a chance of getting his act and life together he has to hit rock bottom. If this doesn't jolt him, then nothing will. If you get weak and take him back, you are just an enabler and in a way just as bad as the drug dealer. Turn off your phone for now. Expect that he will plead, beg, threaten and pretty much try literally anything to get back with you. So do not even give him that opportunity. Stay true to yourself and what you said "if he leaves, it's truly over". He left. It's over.