Confusing Signals

[Kyoshiro Ogari]

Hi all,

 

I had an interesting bus ride home, and I want you to tell me if I imagined what I am about to tell you or has my dream come true. Take note that I have a wild imagination and I am a doofus when it comes to signals from women: either I miss them or misinterpret them and transform them into a fantasy.

 

I take the bus home, and I usually take it at the same time. During the last 2 years there has been this woman, an extraordinarily gorgeous woman who takes the same bus. She's a traffic stopper, but she seems pretty quiet and somewhat down to earth which is what attracts me to her more than her looks alone. Now I try to play it cool and not look at her. I don't want her to feel uncomfortable if I look at her alot because chances are we take the same bus 3 or more times a week.

 

Now, I have been getting off work later, so I didn't see her for about 3 weeks time. Today was the second time this week that I saw her. I was at the back of the bus and she sat a seat right in front of me. No big deal, it was the only empty double seats. As she sat down, she turned her head to look behind her and she looked right at me. No big deal, but I did get extremely "excited" by this because I was extremely shocked that this beautiful woman seemingly turned to look at me.

 

Again, I tried to play it cool, but then about a couple of minutes later she took out a brush and brushed her hair. Wow, in two years that we've rode the bus together, that's a new one. Then she looked herself in the mirror. Another new one. A few minutes later, she shuffles in her seat and turns to look behind her and looks at me again. My heart damn near jumped. Eventually, the bus went express and the lights went off.

 

When the lights came back on, she shuffled in her seat again as if she was going to look back. By God, if she did I would've smiled and probably said, "Goodbye" to her, but she didn't. But right before I got up to leave the bus, she brushed her hair again. When I got up, I was so nervous that I banged my side onto the seat and nearly bruised my ribs (as if I was breathless during this whole ride, which is how I felt.)

 

Now this can all be blown out of proportion. She could be getting ready for a hot date, and I'm transforming reality into fantasy and thinking that she's brushing her hair for me. Oh boy, I need help.

 

Or do I? I want to chat with her, but I feel embarrassed. If any of you watched The Twilight Zone with The Hitchhiker that kept following this woman and she freaked out. We see each other a few times a week, if we ran into each other at a party we'd definitely recognize each other. I just don't want to make her feel uncomfortable. The way she turned to look at me twice really made me extremely nervous and awfully "excited" and it made me think that she finds me cute (?!) And I've had this feeling for about half a year, but what makes me think I'm dreaming is that this could be a guy with low self esteem subconsciously boosting his confidence by molding reality into fantasy.

 

So was this my imagination, or did The Princess think The Frog was cute? Please be brutally honest, I can take it. And what exactly can I say to her? I don't want to say, "Hey baby, you're a hottie, wanna go get some coffee and donuts?" Maybe I can just smile the next time I see her. But I want to do more, but don't know what to do.

 

BAH!

[melrich]

Lol...Who knows what she was thinking!! Doesn't really matter. You know if you don't say hi to her one day you may regret it for the rest of your life.

 

Don't ask her for coffee...just smile at her and say hi one day and see how she reacts. If she blows you off what harm is done and no need to feel awkward next time you see her.

 

Good luck. If you get the courage up (easy for me to sat) let us know how you went.

[traz]

Don't look into any of that too deeply...I wouldn't put much stake on it meaning much.

 

Next time...why don't you just try talking to her? I'd say something to the effect of "Hi there, my name's _____. I've noticed you on this bus a few times" ...and then I guess you can lead on into asking her where she takes the bus, etc etc...dunno, it may just help lead into a conversation.

[Strandysmommy]

Yeah I wouldn't read too much into the hair thing. Were you right at the very back of the bus where there wouldn't be anyone else she could be looking at? Did she get on with someone who was sitting farther back than her? Ok I know it sounds harsh, it doesn't mean that you're not attractive! She could have been turning to look at you. Regardless of if she was or not you really ought to say hi to her. I mean 2 years? For pete sake, I rode the bus for a week and by wedensday one of the ladies on the bus started talking to me. Find something you both can relate to about the bus...like how irritating it is when someone gets on, and then pulls the cord for the stop that's 3 blocks down! Sit near to her next time if you can, and don't let other males intimidate you! You don't know what she's attracted to; she could be appalled by pretty boys who are smooth and slick, and find shy awkward guys irresistible. You have as much right as anyone else to chat it up with her. Just make sure there's no ring on her finger of course. Oh I know it's easy to say to just talk to her...I've been there: there's a perfect oppertunity to talk, and you open your mouth and the words are there but you choke. Give it a try at least.

[Kyoshiro Ogari]

Thanks for your responses, I knew it was just me imagining things because I have this yearning to feel attractive so I often mold reality into fantasy. It'll be hard to talk to her since the bus is always crowded and I get pretty timid, and she gets on after I do, so she'll have to sit next to or near me for starters. Oh well no big deal, I'll just move on. Thanks again guys.

[randy]

but what makes me think I'm dreaming is that this could be a guy with low self esteem subconsciously boosting his confidence by molding reality into fantasy.

 

 

I think this in a matter of speakin it can bost your confidence. You start thinking she likes you and you start trying harder to attract her mostly with body signals etc.

 

I think next time you see her say "Hi, how are you". In a deep sexy gentlemanly voice...give it a try buddy.

[rubberband_man]

wouldn't hurt to still get to know her, you never know...