lied to by omission

[micky1]

Hi There,

 

I just have dealt with a very disturbing situation and would appreciate some unbiased outside opinions.

 

I will make this concise.

 

I got out of a 5 yr relationship at the beginning of this summer. 2 weeks ago I was at a friends party and I saw this girl who I hadn't seen in a while. We immediately started talking and practically spent the whole time together. WE exchanged #'s and there was back and forth texting.

A day or 2 later my best friend had a party at his house. I invited this girl. She said yes and once again spent the whole time at the party with me.

We then carry on texting throughout the week and we see each other at a mutual friends bday party the following weekend.

 

We flirt the entire night, she is very touchy feely and then starts talking about someone she slept with 10 yrs ago. Which then leads the conversation into more intimate territory. At one point she askes me " so whats your deal?" I tell her I just got out of a long term relationship and now Im just staying open to what life brings blah blah..

At this point the sexual tension is crazy but its late and time to go so before I leave I ask her out. She looks at me and says yes, then immediately says she can't bc she's seeing someone and it would be weird.

 

I leave the party totally bummed. It just didn't make any sense. Something in my gut was saying that something didn't exactly feel right. Who is she seeing? And why is she flirting so hard if she is seeing someone? My friend who was with me saw the whole night unfold and he couldn't believe it himself.

 

So, long story short I found out who she has been seeing. My recent ex of 5 yrs.

To make the matters worse, my ex still had not moved all of their things out of my house even after being broken up for 3 1/2 months. So, as soon as I heard this I moved all of their things to a mutual friends house and of course my ex had a freakout about why I would dump their things off somewhere else. I made it aware that I knew what was going on and that would be end of all contact they would ever have with me.

 

Now, this girl has no idea I know yet. I actually received some cutesy text from her while Im moving my ex's crap outta my house. I finally reply to the girl and tell her I know what is up and to stop. She back pedals her way out of it says she had " no bad intentions and was trying to be as honest as possible".

 

Now that is whole chaotic experience is over. I feel so betrayed. I don't even know why I do bc neither one owes me anything. My ex can date whomever. It just hurts to know that no time was wasted in jumping into bed with someone else so soon. And this girl doesn't owe me her loyalty but why would she lie like that to my face.

 

 

Any thoughts on this would be welcome and thanks for taking the time to read

[blueidealist24]

This girl is a player, and wants her fish in more than one pond, to use a silly metaphor, even if she has to lie to keep dipping her pole in. I think you're better off without her and your ex probably is, too, although she (I'm guessing you are all female, or someone in this scenario is bisexual?) may have to learn that the hard way. I'd ignore this girl from now on.

[ParisPaulette]

Either a) the girl is simply lining up more than one fish in her pond as blueidealist said OR she thinks nothing of it, because she's not looking for anything serious and can date whoever she wants. Or, b) and I say this only because it seems like such a weird coincidence, is it possible she and your ex are in cahoots someway to set you up? I only say that, because the impression I get is the whole breakup may have been a rather bad one. Or that this girl is so weird that she decided to go and check out the competition and have a bit of fun messing with your mind?

 

Whatever the reason, this just has too much weird and potential for disaster written on it. I would delete and block her from any avenues if you haven't already and move on forward. Heal and stay NC with your ex, in a way it's good that all of her stuff is now out of your house and you can put the whole matter behind you.

[reinventmyself]

She had to have known you were her current partners ex!. . and to continue to flirt with you and not mention who she was involved with is very calculating and sort of head f*ing.

Bottom line, triangles are never good.

You caught this in time, erase both from contact and your memory. Shake it off and move on.

> people can be so mean and selfish sometimes. .