Mixed Signals

[GodsChosen]

Ive been trying to understand signals a guy Ive was talking to has been sending. He is sure to let everyone know Im off limits. Like he guards me almost. He talks about me constantly and we use to to talk for hours. Recently (the past month and a half) we havent talked that much. I almost feel like hes pushing we away. But when we're together (it isnt that often because we're in separate states) he wants nothing more than to hold me, cuddle with me, and just be around me. Even the way he looks at me. Ive questionef him about his change in behavior and he is so vague with his answer. Now he is pretty much ignoring me. Im hurt because Im confused. He wont talk to me and when he does he is giving vague answers. Hes not seeing anyone which would make more sense to me if he was. I dont get it.

[GodsChosen]

My friends and I recently celebrated his and my close friends birthday. I surprised him and her with a cake and gift. Nothing much. simple. He confessed he had never had a cake before, ever. He behavior surprised me because he really fell to his knees in shock when he saw it. My friends told me that im a woman hes not use to. Even his friends said the same thing. They told me hes "running" because of that but.....idk. Can anyone decipher this behavior?

[ParisPaulette]

As someone else on here so wisely stated, there is no such thing as mixed signals. He's not running, because of anything you're doing or not doing. He's losing interest and if he hasn't moved to relationship territory by now he never will. Sure he's happy to accept gifts and to make out with you, but that's it. And the lack of interest and ignoring you is his way of telling you he either has his eye on someone else or is trying to give you the hint he doesn't want anything serious with you and he realizes maybe he led you to think that.

 

Never try to "interpret" another person's behavior or read things into it that you only want to see. Look at what is and who is there in front of you and accept that that is exactly what it is. He was interested, but over time the interest has died away accept for when you do something for him. But what exactly has he done for you? There are plenty of people who would happily let you chew their food for them and feed them totally by hand, that doesn't mean anything but that they're sort of lazy and will accept whatever is given to them. And that's not the same thing as a guy actively pursuing you and wanting a relationship.

 

When you run into one of those you'll know it. There will be no mixed signals. Mixed signals at best means "good enough for now until someone better comes along" and that's not what good relationships are made of.

[mhowe]

I don't understand. If he lives in a different state, how is he keeping everyone away from you?

[GodsChosen]

this makes sense. I did think that maybe it was him losing interest. I never did anything for him except surprise two friends for their birthday. even his friends were confused by his behavior. thanks for that message!

[GodsChosen]

i meant whenever we would show up at public functions he would shoo away any men that attempted to approach me, even if it was just to say hello. he was very territorial with me. he even went as far as telling them i was spoken for. i guess i see now that i was led on. talk about public humiliation.