dating planning

[reinventmyself]

Here's a question for the guys. . girls welcome to chime in as well.

 

Guys, It is your idea and you are planning something with/for a woman and she happens to have access to flights, deals, ideas, etc.

How much of the planning do you want to do and at what point do you feel like a woman should share in the planning?

 

I hear all the time that guys feel so much pressure to plan trips, outings etc.

I often hear that they would love the woman to jump in and help out or do the planning themselves.

 

At the same time I am a planner, problem solver by trade and I find myself needing to back off.

 

I just had an instance where I am invited to do something and I offer to look for deals and make suggestions.

 

Then in the next moment I second guess myself, back off , try to sit on my hands and let him finish what he started.

I walk a fine line at times not wanting to offend a man who's maybe being chivalrous and wants to make the plans.

 

I am thinking it depends on the individual and it's just something I need to navigate in the moment?

 

be gentle

[catfeeder]

When you do the inviting, you get to decide whether you'll want to just plan the thing and show him a good time or whether you'd like to line up a few options and let him pick something out.

 

I'd avoid overkill with new dates, or you'll be left figuring out how to top yourself--and he'll be equally baffled by what he's supposed to do to reciprocate.

 

On the flip side, when he does the inviting, put aside your fixer role and adopt instead the role of gracious date.

 

That means no bragging about what you can pull off for the two of you at any point--just skip impressing and allow yourself to be impressed by a guy who will like you a whole lot better when he's not set up to compete with you.

 

EnjOy.