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Games/hot & Cold


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So I am a very straightforward person and dont play games or dont know how to lol.


Anyway so theres this guy whos super sweet to me, gives me a lot of attention (a little too much), very curious about me, flirts with me


and then suddenly acts smart. Like short vague responses that makes him sound a tad bit arrogant/not interested.. Its like just when you think he might be and you put yourself out there, you're spinning around again with nothing to move forward on. He plays safe all of a sudden, Like Hot/Cold.


Why the hell do guys do this? I'm so irritated with it...


Waste of time and energy.

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Why the hell do guys do this? I'm so irritated with it...


Waste of time and energy.


this goes both ways... women are the masters of this


game playing is a pain in the... simply don't play... you said it, it's a waste of time, there's a woman i had this happen with... it became very toxic, we we're both playing these games, got into lots of arguments... 2 years later we reconnected... she tries to keep the game going, i don't participate, i just dismiss any game playing so fast it shuts her down.


it makes her more attracted and more comfortable around me because i don't care to see a facade she can put up but rather i want her to be comfortable with who she is with me.


attraction is supposed to be easy!


edit added some examples of her "game playing" and me shutting it down:


example 1 (trying to be more important than she really is):

me: "how are the dance lessons?"

her: "great"

me: "maybe you can give me classes sometime

her: "without me you'd be nothing"


how I would have reacted before: "what no way, (insert some defensive arguments)"

how I react now: me: "you're soooo right..." (with a very sarcastic and shut up tone) and drop it to move forward with some other topic rather than feeding fuel to the fire.


example 2 (regarding meeting up she used to wait till the day of to respond or some other bs):

---- insert some small talk ----

me: "i'd love to see you, let's meet up on x day"

---- no response till x day ----

her: "hey want to meet up?"

me: "no, i already made plans, next time you have 2 days before x to let me know or it isn't happening"


example 3 her not responding till later... i literally wont care, i text her and throw my phone on my bed and i'll check it later, or erase the conversation on whatsapp or whatever so you don't care about the time they read it or last connected.


example 4 (her trying to hook up with another guy while in my presence, to show she is "in demand"):

me: "need some help?" and offer to help her out, she then always comes back to me... all talk no action lol


it's not healthy so i would not try to seek a relationship with this woman BUT i do want to enjoy my time with her, and each time it's getting better because she's learning that she's not getting anywhere with the stupid games.

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It is not just guys, woman too really like to play the "on/off, hot/cold" games as well and it seems like it's my ex gf's favorite game...one minute I mean the world to her, she misses me, what we had, agrees to try a new approach at getting back together, a few days later, changed her mind (due to other people's "pointers") then just tells me good luck with everything, or I contact her, she likes hearing from me and telling me she misses me, but the says we need to try and move on...and not too mention her braking up with me everything something bad happens and then coming back (with this exception of this time so far ) whenever she misses me or regrets her decision...don't be so quick to accuse just guys of this, you females seen to get off on these kind of games as well!

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