Life through my eyes

[Krew]

So this journal for all intensive purposes is somewhere for me to just express my feelings & thought's on day to day life. Both my spelling and grammar are sub par, as well as my sentence structure and use of paragraphs so thanks if you can deal with it, if not read something else.

 

So the cause of me beginning to write this has mainly been reading SA2000's healing journal, as well as Thekid55's journal . Each on their own travels & growth caused by the ending of an important relationship in their lives. In my case being dumped by my first love nearly 3 months ago now, I'm only 20 so in the grand scheme of things this isn't really the end of the world. But for the first 2 months it truly was the worst time of my life, in all things however there is a silver lining & I believe that I have found mine.

 

Thanks to this happening I have grown in leaps & bounds as a person & I have been able to become a better person for it. This has happened through me becoming a more active person, in going to the gym. This being the first time in my life that I have chosen to exercise by choice. Going out to bars & nightclubs & finding that I do actually enjoy it where as before I would never have even considered it. It has also forced me to look at myself as a person & with the help of a councilor I have found some of my own demons. Which i have begun to work to improve and change for my own betterment. So that's why I am doing this just to give you a little bit of background information so here goes nothing.

[Krew]

It's Sunday morning the start of my last week of TAFE for this semester & boy have screwed up. Four assignments still to complete & 5 days to do them in, as well as a test on Thursday. On top of that Iv'e been sleeping in a lot longer then usual and have been really tired, which makes me think my pneumonia is coming back again.

 

On another subject i dreamt about my ex last night & it was a good dream though i could only just remember it when i woke up. I think it's just my mind going back over things though, as it is I've already started the process of moving on with a new girl so happy living there. My parents are away for another month, while our family friends live with my brother & I at our house. Life is on the up now off to the gym I go then lunch with a friend & food shopping for the week.

[Krew]

So it's Tuesday morning & I'm just waiting for my train to go off to TAFE. Last night one of the guys that I went to school with that I still see got engaged, & i can't help but be a bit jealouse of him and his now fiance for having what they do. Though I'm also excited for them as well because they are both great people.

 

I once read on one of my many scrolls through these forums that love is a choice as much as a feeling. That a relationship doesn't just work when you're in love that it takes effort from both sides. I think that is something that is lost on my generation, simply because we don't believe or even understand that idea, which I hate. I think that it's because of television in all honesty that we have so many misconceptions of love and relationships. As well as having so many cases of girls who hate their own bodies or believe themselves to be overweight. It all just frustrates me.

 

It's going to be a long week with assignments to do & tests to study for. Once it's over I will only have another six months of study before i can go out into the work force though, & finally start to make something of myself. Which I'm really excited for so heres to a good week & hopefully a pass in all my subjects.

[Krew]

Well that was a killer of a week, got most of my assignments done & sat my test will hopefully get my results when i go in on Monday. Feeling really exhausted from it all really, 6 hours sleep all week has really run me down. But on the up side I saw my mate who lives & works 8 odd hours away Friday night & some other friends tonight. Then was the good little brother and picked my brother & his girlfriend up from a party.

 

Which funnily enough was basically down the road from my ex's house. It actually felt good to go near her house because i didn't even look in it's direction. As if it doesn't even matter that much to me anymore which is very freeing for me. Also am about to begin going to the gym daily while I am on break from TAFE, so that i can really get some good work done there. I'll try to be back on here Monday morning assuming i have anything to say. Goodnight

[Krew]

So it's been almost two weeks since I posted anything & really a lot has happened. All of it was really little things though.

 

I still have TAFE assignments to hand in three in total, the model making is taking me the longest though I am just a perfectionist with it. I am just about to finish the big one I have been working on for 2 months odd as well which is a good feeling. Overall the last 2 weeks have been really weird because i have had very little motivation to do work, but since this weekend gone I have been super happy.

 

I went out for a friends 23rd I think it was on Friday night & met some really awesome people, then Saturday I went to my mentor's house for his house warming come going away party. He is off to Europe for the second time for 6 weeks. Where I met even more really cool people got really drunk & ate a kebab at 3 in the morning. So all in all an awesome weekend, the Sunday morning I then sat down with my mentor and we hashed out a routine for me for the gym as well. Which my brother has now helped me sort out & he is going to show me how to do all the exercises so I don't hurt myself.

 

So this time next week I will hopefully be finished with TAFE, working out daily & maybe even seeing a girl. Everything is on the up & up I can't say I have ever been more excited for the future, my life is really just about to start & I can not wait.

 

I shall be back in a few days so I shall update again then. Till then toodloo & keep smiling.

[Krew]

So I'm really not good at keeping this updated. I didn't think a few days would turn into 5 months but at least I can say I have been really busy for all that time. I will be back next week for a 5 months worth of updates. Sorry for the long wait's.