I'm so confused and have no idea what to do

[stayClimbing]

I met this girl recently. We went out twice, we haven't had sex yet but I (thought?) we were going to this week. I have absolutely no idea.

 

Last Saturday she texts me super late at night, around midnight (she's out of state). My birthday was very recent. She texts me about my birthday and tells me to celebrate it however I want. I'm like "Okay.." and basically she didn't want me to think we were dating and I replied by saying that it's way too early to talk about this and that I just met her and it takes time for those feelings to develop. She replied by saying she's not interested in a relationship. Anyway we kept texting and eventually she asked if I could tolerate another date with her. One thing lead to another and now suddenly we're talking about very kinky sex, I don't know how this happened. We did this for a couple hours before I fell asleep. I gave one days space and texted her today about it, just replying by saying something like "I have (xyz kinky sex tool). Be ready". She sent me an apology about how it was a drunk text. I replied by saying "Doesn't matter. I know what you like now" to which she replied "Haha, if you say so"

 

I sent back "Ha no! You did" but she didn't reply. We already talked about how neither of us are married to our phones and don't expect an immediate reply or anything but I'm so confused as to what to do now. How do I try to initiate a hangout? Do I even try? She gets back tomorrow but we have no definite plans to hang out. Should I text her "When are you getting back tomorrow" and just call her a couple hours after that?

[Natasha24]

Hmm, it's hard to say. It sounds like she was having a little late night fun and she regrets it now. She may still want to hang out, but cut it out on the sex talk. My guess is, she just wanted to text and have a little fun, but you made it too serious by saying "I have this sex toy. Be ready".

Plus, "Doesn't matter, I know what you like now" sounds a little aggressive (for lack of a better word). I wouldn't have liked that.

 

I would text her tomorrow and just say "Hey, you wanna go to or [dinner] or [whatever] with me on Friday?"

[ChasingHope]

The "doesn't matter" comment, even if meant in jest, does sound a aggressive, and I would be put off, especially after she tried to difuse the situation by basically telling you she was drunk and wouldn't normally behave like that. Don't try to engage in any more kinky talk, and keep things light moving forward.

[wolflovesmoon]

First of all when you are going on dates with a girl, you don`t set a time for when to have sex,( unless its agreed on between the two of you) i mean you don`t know when, it just happen naturally if there is enough chemistry and connection to fuel it.

if it never happen as soon as you want ( you shouldn`t want to have sex that soon or else you will come off you only want sex) then you got to wait till the right the moment, even if you talk about it, don`t bring it up next day, because she will think , that`s what interest you in her, the proper way to deal with what she said was, well sorry i did not know you were drunk, if it makes you uncomfortable to talk about it i respect that and i will not bring it up again, instead you come off like,, well i don`t care you brought it up to we must have kinky sex or talk about it.

Not late thou, initiate contact and ask if she still want to go on a date and don`t talk about kinky or stinky sex at all.

[stayClimbing]

Well she got back to me and said she feels embarrassed to have mentioned that. I'm thinking of just saying "Haha don't worry. You still want to hang out?" and go hiking or something Wednesday... idk??

[stayClimbing]

Oh my god I just remembered there is a massive important football match this Wednesday. My team plays Chelsea at 2:45pm EST, I don't want to miss that for anything. Now what????

[HopsonMcGee]

The OP's post is hilarious. Two dates and you're expecting to be up to your nuts in guts, eh OP? Nice. Okay, so there's no way I can give you an accurate read on this situation. I don't even know the ages of the parties. Maybe it wasn't even her texting you about the kinky sex. Maybe she was hanging out with her friends and they were sending all these sexually explicit texts to you because they thought it was funny, i.e., they were laughing at you and not with you. Hell, maybe it was actually d00d you were sexting with.

 

You're expectations (or "sexpectations" as it were) are way off the map, bro. Two dates? You don't know this girl's a$$ from a hole in the ground. She could totally be effing with you right now for her own personal amusement. And does she live in a different State? Did I read that right? D00d, ease up NOW!

[buddha55]

you don't sound very mature to be blunt. Why don't you see if she contacts you wednesday. if not, contact her on thursday asking for a friday date. and stop talking about kinky sex.... ESPECIALLY after you could tell she was embarrassed. your response was aggressive and not cute. And now you're fretting over a soccer match?

[Cherry009]

Sounds like you want a fwb situation with her, why don't u just tell her that?