How to cope with your Ex and their rebound?

[El3216]

This is a pre-emptive post. I don't suspect this has happened but it is inevitable. This thought and impending future is the only thing now that can get me in a funk. Obviously this is every dumpee's worst nightmare.

 

I (the dumpee) cannot talk to girls yet. Don't want to am I am simply no ready.

 

Since she is the dumper and is the one who called it off I feel like she is probably going to date first. Is there any mind over matter techniques to build up your layer or protection to brush this kind of thing off? These forums have truly been a life saver to me. Since I stumbled on them earlier this month I have virtually lived here everyday since!

 

Thank you in advanced.

[ChellyV]

How will you know what their activities are? The best thing to do is remain NC and not seek any information. If however information accidentally gets to you, I would say be ready for long phases of grieving again and just convince yourself why it never worked out for the two of you in the first place.

 

It kinda causes of a pinch of a pain but oh well, life goes on for all of us.

[happyfrank]

Wish for their happiness. Just remember the good times. If they don't want to be with you. So be it. In time you will find somebody that will be happy being with you and all this will be distant good memory.

[figmentations]

Block them from all forms of communication or knowing what's up in their life. Ask mutual friends not to tell you any news of that type for a very long time.

[El3216]

It wouldn't only be accidental information. I have removed all aspects of social media. I wouldn't ever see her with anyone it would just be thoughts and my cruel imagination

[savignon]

Wish for their happiness. Just remember the good times. If they don't want to be with you. So be it. In time you will find somebody that will be happy being with you and all this will be distant good memory.

 

^^Best advice ever!! Hard to do but very true....

[Mb1212]

Just cut off contact and hope the word never gets to you. Block all social media and hopefully you don't have too many mutual friends. My ex is now dating someone else and because of constant communication I found out. Now I wish I went strict NC after the break up and then I never would have known about this new girl.

[lavenderdove]

Yes the best way to ease that blow is to totally cut contact and block their calls and messages and social networking sites. It takes far longer to let go and get over someone if they are constantly reappearing in your life and you're gettling lilttle glimpses of her life while you're not really a part of her life anymore, just a voyeur on the outside looking in. Since she dumped you, she is just not interested or available to you anymore, and watching or knowing about her life in any way will slow down your healing and set you back.

 

It's hard to cut contact, but just remember she already cut her romantic ties to you and broke your heart, so there's nothing in it for you to stick around for the pain of watching her move on to someone new and act like you're ancient history. That's a self inflicted wound if you stick around for that...

[El3216]

Contact will be cut 100% on my end. I suspect she will have no problem cutting contact with me either. This whole thing sucks because there wasn't even a huge fight or cheating it anything. Just a bunch of in resolved issues that exploded later

[Alone Now]

Just cut off contact and hope the word never gets to you. Block all social media and hopefully you don't have too many mutual friends. My ex is now dating someone else and because of constant communication I found out. Now I wish I went strict NC after the break up and then I never would have known about this new girl.

 

Rebounds are the absolutely worst thing you can do and if she is rebounding then you can expect her to regret it in short order.

[El3216]

She isn't yet ( I wouldn't know gorure as we don't speak) I can't even look at a female right now so I won't be rebounding with anyone.