How can I introduce myself?

[Kyoshiro Ogari]

Hi,

 

I am a very shy man who has a crush on a girl at my workplace, but I am too embarrassed to introduce myself. I always see her in a crowded setting, and I am bashful enough around other people. She is very aware of me because we have seen each other for a couple of years, but we have never had a conversation. I just want to say hello. We don't have any mutual friends, and our work doesn't bring us together, so the only way I can get to know her is to introduce myself. I am not sure if she has a boyfriend or not, and I don't know if I am her type, since I am not good looking. But I really want to introduce myself and take things from there, but I get so so nervous when I'm around her that I avoid looking at her and I run away.

 

Please help me.

[Josh G.]

well try not to be nervous, Just kind of bump into her, maybe, and start talking about soemting appropriate at the time, like a comment to someting that has just happened liek somebody tripped and fell, or your boss just said or did something stupid or is yelling at everybody, try to be co.cky and funny and spontaneous, and after you get her to laugh or get interested or somethign, introduce yourself, depending how professional your job is, maybe offer a handshake, she should introduce herself after that, now the real trick, keeping the conversation interesting and going.....

[Iceman26]

Just talk to her as a friend first and be yourself. I wouldnt try dating her until one of you leaves the company

 

My advice to you is don't date anyone you work with. Period.

[Mr. Cactus]

I have to agree with Iceman. You should really only approach the opposite sex in work environment with a view to being good work associates or casual friends. Trying to take it further in most situations is gambling on disaster (it might turn out wonderfully but it most likely won't). This is esepcially the case with your shyness, as any "failure" at this stage could really blow your confidence terribly.

 

If you approach the situation from simply trying to be a casual acquaitance, there is no pressure on either of you, and it will help you immensely in coming out of your shell. I could barely even talk to girls once upon a time (I think the best I ever managed were a few indistinct mumblings). Bt once I had to start dealing with them all the time on work related matters I completely and utterly came out of my shell and wondered how I was ever like I used to be.

 

As for approaching her, I've usually found the best way (in work situations) to initiate friendships is where you have a specific work issue to discuss with that person. You'll then find it easier to go "off topic" and talk about other things. But whatever you do, don't even give her the remotest impression you are "interested" in her. Just become a trusted and respected work colleague first.

 

And, although this advice is easier given than put into practice, you are going to have to do everything in your power to hide your shyness. Remember to smile and make eye contact without going overboard.

[Kyoshiro Ogari]

Wow you guys are fast! Thanks for your advice so far.

 

Oh, Iceman, that is great advice about the workplace, but it should be no problem here because our company is so large, and we work in two totally different departments, that the only time I see her is during our breaktimes. So even though we work in the same company, we don't "work together." That's why I don't know her name, age, etc...