In the dumps, again.

[progprof]

I was doing really well- getting out, meeting friends, working out, etc. It is 10 days since we broke up, and 9 since I initiated No Contact.

 

Now, though, I can't get him out of my head. I'm missing him terribly, and spending time crying my eyes out- even while washing the dishes. I want to call him. I'm obsessed with who he is with, what he's doing, does he think of me... It's awful torture, and I can't seem to shut it off! I am holding on when I don't want to. And I'm barely able to keep myself from texting him. It's so hard- the day before we broke up was loving and wonderful, and we usually messaged each other all day. Now... nothing. And it's the nothingness that makes me ache for him. I'm afraid I will never hear from him, or see him again.

 

I must admit, it's not as intense as before, but I just want this over with, so I can move on.

[chickydoodle]

I understand your pain.

You must not give in to delusion. Face the reality, painful as it is. Y

ou must find a way to stop these thoughts. It is a choice to indulge. Maybe allow yourself an hour or two to think about him , then STOP. All your feelings are fear based. Have Faith you will survive this and be okay.

Google 'thought stopping' today and just try and keep busy even if you dont feel like it.

 

You will get there. The minutes , hours and days will pass. Stay strong.

[laura-j]

Hang in there my sweetie. I'm two days behind so I guess I have that to look forward to.

 

I wish I could either "eternal sunshine it" or wake up in a month feeling better. But sadly we can't. Just have to realize he probably isn't great either, and the stuff he was doing was really messed up and really hurting you. He doesn't have some brand new fabulous life with the love of his life, he's doing the same stupid crap with the same stupid people.

 

Odds are you will see or hear from him again someday, I think I've only had one completely disappear and never ever hear from/see them again on some level. Assuming the gay community is pretty small where you live, you are bound to cross paths at some point. (Don't freak out.

 

My hope for you is that it is after you have met the love of your life and he is nothing but a memory of a weird time in the past that you shake your head about. (And the NEW love of your life is handsome and smart and funny and fun and loves you with all his heart and is SUPER rich too!...)

[Misaki27]

I feel for you. What you have to do is push through and do stuff. Even if it's something trivial, do it. Read a book, find a new band to listen to, anything that will help get you through these awful days.

 

It's always hard in the beginning, but eventually you get used to it and you'll build a new life filled with fun things and amazing people who care about you. This is just the tunnel you have to go through to get to the light.

[Gonefishin]

It's horrible and if its any comfort looks like we all

Know exactly how you feel ...

Judging from other threads it does get easier and as my mam always said growing up

What's meant for you won't pass you ...

Stay strong and try focus on what's really important right now and that's YOU!

Hope your ok today ..