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Me and my boyfriend is together but


shamyprecious

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He really wanted to break up with me because he said he has lost love for me & Its not the same anymore. I honestly know the reason because of this is my actions. My jealousy and Anger. I need to change my attitude. Since he said he tried for 4 months to rekindle the love. I guess he has lost the love since October. We always argue . EVERYWEEK new argument. I need us to forgive eachother for our past mistakes we both hurt eachother alot. & My boyfriend LOVES putting a wall up. Where he wouldn't talk to me and push away. He says, breaking up is to relieve the hurt. I Cannot BLAME him for wanting to break up. Alot of bull has happened!....

 

He doesn't seem like hes upset that hes still with me even though he wanted things to end. I pleaded and pleaded for him to stay. He knows i'm not going to let him go so soon. Plus its valentines day month! but anywho .. He seems to be texting me fine. He says his emotions are mixed (He wants to go/ wants to stay) sort of thing.

 

Tonight I plan on having a relationship therapy session/ steps to recover conversation. He says that will be okay. What things should I include in this convo

 

My boyfriend also doesn't want to say "I love you" anymore intill its back the way its so post to be. Is this good ? we been together for a year and 7 months

 

Things I need to change: Jealousy, Anger issues, Trust issues ( Don't have a reason to be) Show more positive issues . Have high self esteem, Not be insecure, Fix communication ( Both of us should fix communication )

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It sounds to me like you are doing your part. But I think that he sounds like he may be passive aggressive. I don't know, you say alot of what you did wrong but not much about what his part was. Does he withdraw alot from you, making you run towards him and taking the blame? Why are you angry and jealous.... did he break your trust and instead of earning it back he is withdrawing to punish you for feeling the affects of that? There is not alot of info here.... are you sure this is all your fault?

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It sounds as if he is only with you at this point because you pleaded with him not to go and are practically forcing him to be with you. You cannot force someone to be with you, it may work for a little while, but if he wants to leave, sooner or later he will find a way.

 

It seems this relationship is severely damaged. It's good that you are working on your issues and have recognised these to be the problems but these kinds of changes don't happen overnight. It takes a lot of work and effort. Issues like this usually run very deep. I hope it isn't too late to save your relationship.

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I think you should admit that its over and commit 100% to self improvement. If you don't then you are going to be in for more miserable relationships in the future. Fixing communication won't help the relationship with someone who is constantly angry, jealous and has poor self esteem. let him go.

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