Bugged by divas

[Celadon]

It's my turn to vent about the "diva" factor ...

 

So, I'm hoping y'all might have some advice on how to handle myself around women who are really good at getting attention for themselves, because it's driving me nuts.

 

Like ... I have a co-worker who butts into my conversations with other people and takes them over by talking loudly and excitedly.

 

Like ... One girl in my group of friends will take something I said earlier and pass it off to the group like she thought of it. Plus she'll talk right over me (but of course, no one else seems to notice this...)

 

I'm mad partly because I believe that people should be considerate of each other. I'm also mad because when I'm around these women, I start feeling competitive, like "hey, I want some of the attention too!!" And I don't want to have to compete.

 

I don't know what to do to make myself feel better about this. IF I could turn it all into some sort of joke, I'd probably feel better ... Help!

[Ated]

I think people (boy or girl) gets attention when they are confident! Not "look at me, look at me!" confident, the hey i admire myself because event though im not good at this, im good at other things.

 

Being confident means your comfortable with yourself. Being comfortable with yourself means that you know what you want and don't want. I think you should be assertive. Being funny also helps get attention. Be natural abut it tho. Not like TRYING HARD to be funny. Let it flow...

 

As for your friend, don't get competitive. She's 'confident'. You should be too!

 

I probably would talk to ur friend (the one who butts in convos) in the low, just expressing yor feelings. Say something like: I would really like it if next time, you let me finish what i have to say. Tonight, i really felt neglected and i know you didn't do it in purpose. Or sumtihing like that.

 

I hope i helped

[Celadon]

Thanks, Ated! I appreciate your reply and advice. I agree about being funny, it does make people happy. I *have* been making more of an effort lately to be funny, but I hope I am not trying too hard!!

 

I guess I have another question, then:

 

How can I LOWER MY EXPECTATIONS of other people, especially in social situations?

 

You see, I expect people to listen, but when I notice they are not, it makes me feel annoyed. The other day, I was talking with one of the divas, plus a guy friend. I was saying something, then she interrupted to say something totally unrelated. So I paused, then continued and finished what I was saying.

 

Then the guy immediately turned to HER and asked her about what she said. I felt annoyed and hurt by that! (And no, she already has a bf, so I don't think he was hitting on her.)

 

That's just one example, but things like that bug me frequently, unfortunately. Do I need to adjust my expectations of people? I would like to have more fun at parties, and even just with groups of friends, instead of getting bothered.

 

Sorry, that was a bit long-winded, but I would appreciate anyone's advice. Thanks!