the time we need

[ChellyV]

soliciting your advice on time issue me and my boyfriend (3 years on and off) are having, a chronic issue that is leading to animosity sometimes.

 

he has his 16 year old son every other weekend. so i can only hang out with him every other saturdays too, when he is free of parental responsibilities. sometimes he would stay the night, oftentimes he would be in a hurry to get out of the door.

 

hanging out during the week is out of the question. he just cannot. to this day, i ask myself why, but i have put in a lot of effort to get past it and just be contented with the every other saturday arrangement. truth be told, it is killing me. why cannot i randomly call my boyfriend to go bowling or just chill together?

 

i have talked to him twice about possibly spending more time, and talking to him more. currently, he would call me in the morning at which time i can't talk much as i am at work. i would call him at night but he wouldn't take the call and will just send a text that he is off to bed. his job starts at 430am and so, i have learned to simply share my day with other friends.

 

i do not know anymore how to handle this. i love him but i have some needs that aren't met. what to do?

[SpottiOtti]

Wait a minute. You two live in the same town and you only see him every other Saturday? And it's been like this for three years? And he won't tell you why you can't see him during the week?

 

Something fishy is going on here. Or am I missing something?

[ChellyV]

thank you for responding.

 

yes it has been like this after the first year of our relationship. when he moved houses, he started to shun me out of the new place. i no longer have access to go there as i please, which is not even frequent. he wants to keep his independence but i am thinking after 3 years, isn't it time to pace it up a little bit.

[Ms Darcy]

He wants independence after 3 years ... perhaps he is not really that into you.