I am scared to live on my own. . .

[TalkThatTalk9]

well....

 

I went and looked at an apartment today! This may not seem like a big deal to some but it is to me.

 

I am 5 months out of a 6 year relationship, living with him for 3. when he broke up with me, it left me with nothing and I was forced out of my home of 2 years into a bedroom in my stranger aunts home 2 hours away from the "home" I knew. it has been a very extremely difficult situation for me.

 

I had originally planned to move back to the town from which I was living with the ex, but I am starting to realize I should not. I am starting to get over him, I am in a good place, and I do not need to drag myself back down that road right now.

 

I went today, looked at the place. He wants 500 for rent and 500 for deposit. I asked if he would be willing to work out a payment plan for the deposit, because I can not come up with it that fast, he said he would.

 

it is my hometown, where I was born and raised. he knows my family, likes them, I know he will rent to me... he seemed to want to. I filled out the application and turned it in. I am waiting to see if my work will transfer me to the town the apartment is at (it is grocery, they have multiple locations)

 

I will basically know tomorrow if it will all work out. and I have to say I AM SO SCARED

 

I have never lived on my own. To get this apartment and keep it, I Am going to have to really REALLY budget and cut my spending big time. I am really bad with budgeting money, but I want this apartment so bad that I am willing to do whatever it takes... that includes getting a second job and cutting my spending in half. I am going to try my best to get a second job as soon as I would move to town. I can't get a second job until I move because I do not drive, and transportation to the job would be an issue.

 

 

I am just afraid to be on my own. I was relying on my ex for SO MUCH when I lived with him. He paid most the bills (I paid as much as I could every month to them, which equaled to half or a little under of the bills). I never had to write the checks out to the companys and deal with it. He fixed everything. (all things i am sickened by now and wish I could take back because it ruined our relationship and it turend me into a spineless jellyfish)

 

I just want to be able to function as an adult, this is a big step for me. I'm scared I am going to fail. I keep thinking I am going to fail with it. I am not thinking "oh this is going to be my new home, I will be on my own and ok. My life is going to be great" I am thinking how this is not going to work out for me.

 

anyone else have these worries when getting their first place? how do you budget your things, any tips? thank you all for listening to me freak out. I am just getting scared!

[Natasha24]

Congrats! I know exactly how you feel.

 

I know it's scary now, but trust me, it will get better. I guarantee you will LOVE living on your own. At first, it can be a little lonely and boring. But after a while, you'll be ecstatic to walk around the house naked and sing Britney Spears at the top of your lungs with no one around to judge you, haha. You will definitely start feeling like an adult very soon, and it's a fulfilling feeling.

 

I don't have any budgeting tips because I suck at that as well. All I can say is I understand that you're scared and worried that it won't work out. But I promise, in a few months, you'll be kicking yourself for not doing this sooner and for relying on your ex so much.

[itsallgrand]

Oh my god, I am SO excited for you! First time living alone is so exciting, so scary at first, but it is so rewarding. I DO remember my first place alone, remember it fondly. Learning how to install my first air conditioner lol, how to fix all those little things that go wrong - it was a part of an old building that had been converted into suites, and had a tonne of charm (a.k.a. things were sometimes falling apart! lol). And I got a lot of lee way as far as doing what I wanted with the place, since it wasn't a standard apartment in a block, and honestly the place was just COOL. There was even a bearclaw tub that was elevated up, and storage space with old junk for me to rummage through and use as I pleased.

 

But back to you!!!

 

If you have any questions, ask away. Yeah, that is where I learned to budget. So much for food, so much for rent, so much for transport, so much etc...And I started by dealing a lot in cash. Actually old school - take the cash out, and when it is gone, it is gone.

 

500 dollars is a good deal! Do you like the place? Is this a personal tenant agreement or a one through a big company (does he have other properties)? You will have your landlord to call on if problems in the place happen - you have that right. But it is good to be able to rely on yourself to do things too if need be.

 

I am very good at making a little go far and ways to start out....so if you need anything along the way, any questions, it'd be my pleasure to add any tips or suggestions along the way.

 

But for now, congratulations on your step and I hope you get the place!!!

[TalkThatTalk9]

aaw thanks guys you are making me feel better

 

I love the place!! hahhaah. it is not spectacular but so cute and tiny just right for me.

 

the landlord is so nice it would be a 12 month lease.

 

500 is a great deal, that is why I am picking this specific town.

 

the fact he is willing to work with me for the deposit is amazing you wouldn't find that most places.

 

it is in the same town as my grandma, I have her close by. there is laundry on site. oh it is just great for me

 

hopefully my work transfer will work out. if not I am ok with it but I want it to really bad.

 

I know if I budget and stick to it I will be ok. I am so ready to be on my own. I've wanted this for a really long time.... even while with the ex. It is time to rely on myself!!!!