yamajii89 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Hello my girlfriend and i are madly in love with each other, we have been together for 3 months now however she still wont give me sex. We do however cuddle and get naked but bellow the belt is off limits, she keeps her pants on and insist that i keep mine too. I have talked to her about it, and she said that she is just scared of getting pregnant, now i talked her through oral sex and how it wont get her pregnant (correct me if i am wrong) according to my personal doctor anyways. However from the day we first made it in bed we got rid of some limitations like, her shirt and her bra. and now to be honest just recently took my pants off. But insisted to keep on my boxers, she also started to touch my penis a little, with the cloth on of course. What should i do? thanks. Link to comment
DN Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 She has a right not to have sex if she doesn't want to, whatever the reason. You have a right to end the relationship and find someone on the same page as you if you want a relationship that is sexual. Link to comment
orange1234 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Sorry if I'm wrong but I'm assuming you're in high school? I'm in my mid 20s but I'm still like your girlfriend; I've even had a year long relationship without sex. At the same time, I've had a one night stand too (which I now regret), but that was because I didn't care about the guy. When I really like someone, I take my time because I don't want to end up feeling like I was used for sex. Three months is not that long, especially if it is her first time. Link to comment
yamajii89 Posted July 10, 2012 Author Share Posted July 10, 2012 Sorry if I'm wrong but I'm assuming you're in high school? I'm in my mid 20s but I'm still like your girlfriend; I've even had a year long relationship without sex. At the same time, I've had a one night stand too (which I now regret), but that was because I didn't care about the guy. When I really like someone, I take my time because I don't want to end up feeling like I was used for sex. Three months is not that long, especially if it is her first time. no i am a collage graduate and is 21. but thank you very much this put some sense in me. i love the girl, and i am not in it just for the sex, and anyways i think by our progression i suppose we will get there soon hopefully. thank you very much Link to comment
Roxie84 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 Let me guess... virgin? You talked her through oral sex, but did you perform it on her? Mutual gratification my dear! She just needs time. Yes 3 months is a long time to wait, but when a girl is a virgin (or very inexperienced) and has a first time relationship, she'll make a guy wait quite a long time. Don't be discouraged, some people just need time. In the meantime, enjoy being in love. It may sound cliche but the longer you wait and the more you are in love with her, the more AMAZING it will be Link to comment
Roxie84 Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 oh, and the "worried about getting pregnant"..... ummmm, maybe us Canadians are weird, but we were educated on condoms and the birth control pill in grade 6... just sayin' lol Link to comment
Avila Posted July 10, 2012 Share Posted July 10, 2012 STOP PRESSURING HER. My sister is around your age and she's just now got her first boy friend. They've been going out for the same time you and your partner have and she's still not ready to have sex. A part of that is feeling pressured. On the other hand, my ex didn't pressure me once. Not once. He made it clear that he wanted to get to know me first and that it was entirely up to me when I wanted to do it. So 3 monthes into it, we were alone and he asked if I wanted to and I said yes. I was comfortable saying yes because as i mentioned, i wasn't pressured and knew I could say no at any time and he wouldn't throw it in my face. be patient. let her go at her own pace. if she's a virgin it's a big deal and she want's to feel like she can trust you. act like a trustworthy person and it will happen I know it's hard, but just chill. also i would encourage you to have a talk to her about what would happen if she did got pregnant. have a think about that. also talk about contraception. she should be on the pill or some other form of contraceptive along with you using condoms. remember that if you both start having sex that you need to be STD tested before you stop using condoms. Good luck! Link to comment
yamajii89 Posted July 11, 2012 Author Share Posted July 11, 2012 Thanks guys for the awesome advice, i guess i just have to wait. and i did talk to her about contraceptives, she just wont risk it regardless. but i feel that we are getting there, since i let her take the wheel she gives me something new every time Link to comment
Avila Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 good man! remember that it's a journey and not a destination. it's a cliche but true. looking back on my relationship (now that it's ended these are some of the times you remember the most. really do enjoy her and cherish her. she'll likely get over it at her own pace. keep chilled out and it'll happen when she's ready. Link to comment
Ms Darcy Posted July 11, 2012 Share Posted July 11, 2012 Yeah, I don't really think sex is going to happen anytime soon. Link to comment
Avila Posted July 13, 2012 Share Posted July 13, 2012 UPDATE... My sister who was apprehensive about having sex finally did do it with her bf. SO BE PATIENT AND IT WILL HAPPEN. Much luck! And remember? Her first time is about her Follow that basic principle and she will be back for more xo Link to comment
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