Not Sure How to Feel About this Guy...

[victorianrose]

So an old friend of mine and I recently got back in touch via Facebook. He started off telling me that I had grown into a beautiful young woman and flirting, then he brought up that he would like to date me. He blew the engine of his truck out and has to fix it, but said as soon as he gets it fixed we can go out. But once I asked him, as we had been having less frequent contact, if he were still interested in dating, and he told me that he wanted to get to know me better because he didn't want to jump too fast into a relationship with me and end up screwing it up. He even told me these exact words "I know that if an opportunity comes up, we will both know, and if the time is right, then we will be together." Sounds like he at least feels attracted toward me? We were texting fairly regularly before, but recently he sometimes doesn't text back and I sometimes give him a little nudge and we have a good conversation, then it happens again. So for right now I am just not going to text back at all until he does first, but it's really hard for me to get my mind off of this. I wasn't having such strong feelings at first but now it's really hard for me to not worry about this situation. How should I approach this situation and how should I act toward this guy when and if he texts back?

[Ms Darcy]

Try not to get attached to men before you see them and date them. All you are attached to now are his words. He has no actions to back it up. Whenever someone talks a big game at first and then starts to backtrack I lose interest. He may have a girlfriend or he is pursuing other women on the side. I would not take him seriously.

[catcountry]

IMO...If a man is interested in you he will figure out a way to get together. The engine on his truck blew? Really? There aren't taxi's, bus, and if you live in a city...subway. Can you meet me somewhere? Means nothing...and think of it as nothing until he makes it happen. Seems like excuses to me....nothing but a bunch of words. Act like it means nothing until he makes it something....better yet...forget it until he makes it something. Less frequent contact IMO = back burner. A blunt opinion...yes. Your decision..just calling it like I see it. Best to you!

[victorianrose]

We live out in the country so public transportation doesn't sit well with me. And he has offered meeting up at places, but I told him I rather a guy come and pick me up and take me out on a date, me meeting out with guys has never worked in the past. He said he's working on the engine, but I don't know...problem is I already feel attached, I wasn't at first but now I guess since he just seems...I guess more distant, it's there. I guess we miss what we lose.

[DylanNotorious]

If the engine on his truck has blown up, then really how can he come and pick you up??? He has offered to meet you elsewhere but you won't go. I say he is making an effort, yet you think he is not.

[victorianrose]

he offered to meet up at the bowling alley, but it was like 9:30 at night when he offered. i still live at home with my parents, and my mom says that any guy who even comes and picks a girl up after 8:30 or so is only looking for booty call, i dont know but thats her logic, so i had to turn him down on it. i think he was making an effort, yes, it's just now that i haven't received a reply on texting since around 3 yesterday, and it's not the first time it's happened, well i don't know...you think i should text him back anyways? since maybe he has the wrong idea i really got no idea

[DylanNotorious]

Oh ok, for some reason you appeared a lot older than you are. But since you live at home, your mother is probably right. I take back what I said, and no I wouldn't have gone meeting up with someone at 9.30pm at night (on your own without him picking you up). And no I wouldn't continue texting him until he rung you and made plans properly.

[catcountry]

Oh ok, for some reason you appeared a lot older than you are. But since you live at home, your mother is probably right. I take back what I said, and no I wouldn't have gone meeting up with someone at 9.30pm at night (on your own without him picking you up). And no I wouldn't continue texting him until he rung you and made plans properly.

 

I second this.

[victorianrose]

Oh ok, for some reason you appeared a lot older than you are. But since you live at home, your mother is probably right. I take back what I said, and no I wouldn't have gone meeting up with someone at 9.30pm at night (on your own without him picking you up). And no I wouldn't continue texting him until he rung you and made plans properly.

i am 19 actually. i didn't want to go meet up at that hour either, that's why i am waiting for him to get his truck worked out. he seems to be thinking that getting to know me in person is the best way, instead of just talking on the phone or texting, but i may be wrong. i don't want to burden him with it, as he was texting me for several hours yesterday, but at the same time it's depressing when he just stops contact all together.

[The_Seeker]

IMO...If a man is interested in you he will figure out a way to get together. The engine on his truck blew? Really? There aren't taxi's, bus, and if you live in a city...subway. Can you meet me somewhere? Means nothing...and think of it as nothing until he makes it happen. Seems like excuses to me....nothing but a bunch of words. Act like it means nothing until he makes it something....better yet...forget it until he makes it something. Less frequent contact IMO = back burner. A blunt opinion...yes. Your decision..just calling it like I see it. Best to you!

 

Interesting.

 

Thanks catcountry, I'm saving this in my journal!