Does he really just want to be friend's only?

[natash24]

My boyfriend and I broke up two weeks ago but he said he would love to remain friends. He called me this weekend to ask how I was doing and we talked on the phone for almost 2 hours something we have never done before because he hates the phone. He ended up suggesting we go to the movies and we did and I thought he was going to profess his love for me and desire to get back together but he didn't. we ended up saying goodbye and I wrote him an e-mail telling him how glad I am that we are trying to be friends and such. he e-mailed me back expressing the same sentiment and said I can call him whenever I want to talk or whatever. My question is I dated this guy for 8 months and he said he loved me and things were very special until we had the last major argument. Do I have a chance with him still ? Do men really want to be just friend's with their exes and no longer desire them to be more? He says this is the first time he has tried to be friend's with an ex because I mean so much to him. I keep on holding out hope that we can work this out that he will find he loves me again but it hurts to be so close to him and not be able to hug or kiss him. Has anyone ever gone through a break -up and then reunited with their love after being friend's for a while? Any input or advice about what he could possible be thinking would be great!

[Gia2Cute4U]

Men often do exactly what your ex is doing to you. It's a control issue (in my opinion). He thinks if he remains friends with you, he can see other people in the mean time, yet you will still be there for him. So, in the drop of a hat... you are his once again.

 

If I were you I would tell him how you feel. If what you said is the whole case, than it looks like he's not interested in you as anything more than a friend.

 

If you were really meant to be together, than why are you going through this "friends" stage? Maybe it's meant to be that you remain friends.

 

Don't let him be your only option as far as boyfriends, and romance goes.

 

Keep kissing those frogs, and one day you will find your true prince.

[cookies]

It isn´t a control issue in my views. Sometimes things may be moving a little faster than they can handle, so by backing off a little bit and being friends allow you both to develop a much stronger bond, that is bound to grow deeper, and since the love has already been there for 8 months,...it will grow as well.

 

IN this instance, i think that you should NOT proclaim your love to him first, in the event that he is seriously wanting friendship only. Since you two are only friends, enjoy and cherish it for its face value, and allow yourself to meet and hang out with other guys sometimes. IT will only add zest to the relationship, allowing him to see that you can become interested in other guys, just as he...

 

By slowing things down a notch like this, really is a good thing for a lasting relationship, as it gives you both freedom, and at the same time the opportunity to step "back" and see you for what you are bringing into their lives and possible future. ITs not a woman´s place to chase a man, in my humble opinion. A man that finds a good woman, finds a good thang. Just keep being yourself, the loving, sweet, and fun to hang out with- friend that he always loved from the beginning. This way he will not only fall in love with you all over again, but place you in a category waay above other chiks he comes accross...

 

the way i look at it, is if you can be his " friend" and secretly still in love, you will possess this special way, and tender way that you will treat him, and it has its way of drawing him closer to you, and he will let u know just how much he appreciates you and love you someday...just dont put a rush on it...

 

Just let it all unfold nicely, in the meantime...you can love the renewed friendship that you have rediscovered in him. IM sure he puts magic in ur eyes..

 

enjoy it...

 

cookies

[jonson]

Hi.

I suppose you would like to hear a guys point of view on your very sticky situation. So here it goes.

It sounds to me like this guy still really like you. I mean if he didn't like you whatsoever there is no way that he would be inviting you to the movies and sending you emails only two weeks after you have broken off. Believe you me if a guy really doesn't want to be with a girl they will tend to cut off all communication. So take it from me, I think that he has realised how much you actually mean to him after you have broken up. He is probably just a little afraid to jump straight back into anything.

I think if you just give him time, try not to throw yourself at him or anything, then he will eventually come around.

I know from my own personal experiences that waiting and all that for someone to tell you how they fell can be the most anxious and disturbing feelings one can get, but if you can manage to get through that, the feeling of you guys getting back together will be sensational.

 

Good luck with it

Jonson.

[natash24]

Hi I hope all of you who were kind enough to repond to my first message read this. I was thinking about things today and I felt that if we tried to be friends, we would eventually get lazy in the relationship and take each other for granted and it would hurt me so much because I keep on holding onto hope that we will get back together. So I called him said it hurt to much to try to be friends and I need to make a clean cut. I figured this will force him to think about whether it was worth throwing what we had away or worth going into it trying with committment. he said he still has strong feelings for me and that maybe in the future we can still try and be friends but I just said it would be a long time for me to get over him completely. I figure I can always call him later and we can be friends when things have settled down. Was I right in my thinking? I still love him very much and want him back so I am hoping this will work.