Open Relationships.

[calisurfer]

I have a pretty diverse group of friends and noticed that most of the relaltionships ,within my group, that seem to last throughout the years are open ones, e.g, two of my friends early 30's have been together since their soph year in college they are going on over a decade. Which is, one, unheard for such a young couple and ,two, add to the fact that they're gay well it's just hard to believe. Now move on to my mom's next door neighbors. Gay couple in their mid to late 40's been together since early their 30's. Another friend and his BF, ones 30 others 24, going on 3 years together, now their relationship isn't in the double digits years, but they still are a strong couple and its obvious when you're around them. One thing all these couples have is that they are in open relationships. They each have certain rules and boundaries though.

 

Now for the questions. Do you guys think monogamy is possible for two men in a relationship? I mean we are men and every know and then we get the urge to try something or someone new. Now for some that urge might be stronger than for others, should that be encouraged once in a while? Would you be okay with your partner wanting to have sex with a stranger once in a while? But knowing that it's just sex, nothing less nor more. I know being in an open relationship opens up a can of worms, just the though of picking up an STD is huge. I just wanna get opinions and thoughts from you guys. I don't want to debate the morality of it nor judge people that are in 'em as being * * * * ty. Just want honest opinions. Thanks.

[Moontiger]

I know I couldn't do it! Lol, I think it just depends on the people. I am a solid mongy but some people just are not.

[Moontiger]

I just wanted to add, while there are some "rules" to relationships to make them healthy and happy everyone is different. For example, some "rules" that often get cited on even are: communication, honesty, and self awareness.

 

I am self-aware enough to know I just could not be in an open relationship. Now, someone else might be different from me, it is their responsibility to be honest and communicate this to their partner. So I don't think its so much that its the open relationships that make this couples last a long time but their ability to communicate and negotiate the issues with in the relationship in away that makes them both comfortable.

[Rangafro]

I know monogamy is possible for two guys, but that's not really the right question though. An open relationship isn't a solution for people who can't remain faithful or committed to their partner. In fact it is probably more difficult. Cheating is an inherently selfish act and demonstrates a severe lack of respect for your partner, but giving your partner the liberty to explore other relationships requires a certain degree of selflessness and respect for their autonomy. I know you didn't want to talk about morality, but to me the only valid question to ask yourself when judging one way or the other is where do your values lie? Don't just do what feels convenient, relationships are hard either way.