I got totally led on.

[sandrawg]

Well, my guy had already BEEN in my pants before using the "L" word. Many times. He didn't even have to push for a relationship, to get in my pants. After we'd been dating a while, he clearly said he wanted us to be boyfriend/girlfriend. Introduced me to his family, co-workers, etc.

 

As for the love letter, yeah..there is a chance that played a role. My exhusband and I used to write love letters all the time, even before we married. I've sent that letter to a couple guy friends to see what they thought, and they both thought anyone who didn't appreciate the sentiments I expressed in it, was an idiot. But..people are different.

 

There's an update on this story, actually. A mutual friend had dinner with him last night. I did NOT want to hear anything about it, but my friend pushed me to listen-I guess because he thought it would help. He said my ex said that while he acknowledges I'm an amazing person and all that, he needs to get his life together.

 

He had only JUST broken up with a girl when we met and he needs to get over that. Plus, he's not happy with his life. He hates is job. He lives with his parents. He said he "can't be responsible for anyone else's emotions right now", whatever that means.

 

That could still be a crock.

 

I'm posting another thread to see if people think I should maintain NC or try to sit down with him to get the TRUTH, for closure purposes (certainly NOT to get him back. I don't want him back. Too many mixed messages. He's a mess.), and because he is friends with so many of my friends. I can't really avoid the guy forever.

[sandrawg]

I know exactly how you feel. This was probably the most exciting, passionate, connected relationship I've ever had, and I'm 44. I've been married and been in quite a few LTR's.

 

It's even more painful to be cut off, when you feel like things are going well. I'm sorry your ex sounds like an idiot...to leave you so he could go for someone much younger..

 

Well, hopefully he'll find a nice golddigger who'll bail on him when he starts getting too slow and feeble. Younger women have a tendency to do that...I've been on a lot of age gap rel'ship forums and seen people report that kind of behavior again and again.

[rapunzel]

Well, I certainly made some mistakes. Don't we all...and so did he. It probably was not ALL an age related matter but I do know through his internet dating ads, et cetera that he seeks a much younger woman. Also his ex-wife left him for a man 10 years younger so I think he will always need to get back at her in that way. Whatever, it's his life and he's out of mine - unfortunately not completely since we do work together part time. I doubt he'll get a gold digger since he doesn't have money. He is exceedingly good looking and in amazing shape, intelligent and has a beautiful natural scent so I expect he'll land a younger woman with a trust fund or who makes a lot of money. With musicians, I've seen it time and time again! They marry younger and they marry up.