I think i'm making progress, your opinions are highly valued :D

[lonelyboy802]

Didn't really know where to post this, but it does have some personal growth merits.

 

I'm 20, live with my mum, have a full time job (an okay retail job) but its not enough to live by myself comfortable off of.

 

 

Suffer from severe depression, took two years after highschool off to do nothing. Tried to kill myself multiple times, had many conversations with myself "soul searching" if you will. In these sessions with myself I slowly started to change things I was unhappy with in my life. I gave myself a goal, and i'm now working toward it.

 

With the money from the job I will pay for most if not all of my college fees by myself. The way I see it is that college is my decision, and I should be responsible for my mistakes and failures. I just see this as another venture in life, why should my mother have to pay should I fail.

 

My coworkers have been asking why i'm doing this, they all say the same things "can't you apply for finacial aid?" "why doesn't your mother pay for it?" No, I cannot apply for financial aid, mom makes enough money (i'm pretty sure it's based off household income.) And even if I could apply for financial aid, I don't like to be in debt and the local community college isn't that expensive If I work for a couple months I should be able to pay for everything in full.

 

It's the way my coworkers ask the questions, as if they don't understand why I'm making it hard for myself. I also get the feeling that they think I'm a bit dense for not taking the easy route. Also that i'm "wasting time", when I could be working towards my career choice.

 

I believe if you want something, YOU should go out and take it. I'm not above asking for help though, hence why i'm still with my mom, or else saving for college would take years with this job. Personally I think i'm putting up a show in an empty theater. I am the actor and I am the audience. Who am I trying to impress with this? But it just goes back to my beliefs, work for what you want, perseverance and dedication.

 

Tell me what you think, I'm curious to know good or bad I can take it

[Raaawr]

Didn't really know where to post this, but it does have some personal growth merits.

 

I'm 20, live with my mum, have a full time job (an okay retail job) but its not enough to live by myself comfortable off of.

 

 

Suffer from severe depression, took two years after highschool off to do nothing. Tried to kill myself multiple times, had many conversations with myself "soul searching" if you will. In these sessions with myself I slowly started to change things I was unhappy with in my life. I gave myself a goal, and i'm now working toward it.

 

Time off doing nothing can be a bit dangerous when you are feeling down. Purpose helps you cope but Im glad you came out with a goal.

 

With the money from the job I will pay for most if not all of my college fees by myself. The way I see it is that college is my decision, and I should be responsible for my mistakes and failures. I just see this as another venture in life, why should my mother have to pay should I fail.

 

That is very responsible of you. I am currently doing the same thing.

 

My coworkers have been asking why i'm doing this, they all say the same things "can't you apply for finacial aid?" "why doesn't your mother pay for it?" No, I cannot apply for financial aid, mom makes enough money (i'm pretty sure it's based off household income.) And even if I could apply for financial aid, I don't like to be in debt and the local community college isn't that expensive If I work for a couple months I should be able to pay for everything in full.

 

If your mother is a single parent then she should be eligible for some form of financial aid to help with college fees. There are unforeseen expenses, its not as simple as just paying your fees. If aid is there you should use it, its the reason its there.

 

It's the way my coworkers ask the questions, as if they don't understand why I'm making it hard for myself. I also get the feeling that they think I'm a bit dense for not taking the easy route. Also that i'm "wasting time", when I could be working towards my career choice.

College is working towards your career choice. Keep going as you are but I really think you should look into financial aid. If there is none available then nothing lost eh?

 

I believe if you want something, YOU should go out and take it. I'm not above asking for help though, hence why i'm still with my mom, or else saving for college would take years with this job. Personally I think i'm putting up a show in an empty theater. I am the actor and I am the audience. Who am I trying to impress with this? But it just goes back to my beliefs, work for what you want, perseverance and dedication.

Its not about playing for a show or looking admirable. You are taking pressure out of your mother's life. You have given yourself a goal and you have taken on responsibility. All which will help you grow as a person and will stand to good use in the future.

[Flyingpiglet]

I think you should be immensley proud of what you have a achieved and where you currently are in life after what sounds like years of struggling. I for one admire your outlook, beliefs and desire to work hard for what you want!

 

As long as you will ask for help if it's needed then I don't see the problem. Sure if finacial aid was available then why not... You will put back into the community later on when you are following your chosen career.

 

As for who are you trying to impress. You don't have to be impressing someone all the time, just rest in the knowledge then when you are where you want to be in your career, (and even before that), you can look back with pride and satisfaction that you have moulded a good life for yourself. Sometimes, the harder we have to work for something the more we appreciate it when we get it!

 

I'm just curious, are you getting help with your depression etc? My only worry would be that if you put yourself under too much stress and you are going it alone that things could get on top of you!

 

But apart from that... Good luck with everything!