Break NC, thoughts?

[fiddie]

I have essentially been NC with my ex since we broke up, over a month ago, with her contacting me a few times. Eventually I asked her not to contact me anymore, about a week and a half or two weeks ago. I still miss her but I feel myself getting better each day and I can see the light at the end of the tunnel now.

 

 

I still care for her even after ripping my heart out I will always consider her a friend and I would like to know how she is doing. I have no ulterior motives for this, I would like to text her and ask her how she is doing and maybe even let her know that it would be ok to contact me again.

 

Does anyone have any thoughts on if this would be a good idea? bad? or even when to truly tell when it is ok to break NC.

 

 

 

Thanks All.

[italiannmf24]

It depends, do you still want a relationship from her or would you be okay with friendship?

[fiddie]

I would be okay with a friendship. At this point in time if she came back to me and admitted it was a mistake to break-up I would try to make a relationship work again. But I am not going to ask her to change her mind or even mention getting back together. Most of all I want to make sure she is okay and let her know that there are no hard feelings.

[italiannmf24]

If you're comfortable with her having a new boyfriend in the picture and have completely healed from the old relationship, you can give friendship a try.

 

If not, then I'd suggest staying in NC and continue working on yourself.

[RitaTrue]

^I agree with this. How ok would you be if she was over you, and found a new boyfriend?

[Mustachio]

You broke up a month ago. I would be surprised if you truly had no ulterior motive other than just catching up. On the surface that may be true, but there is a part of you that is missing her and longs to hear her voice, then when the reality of the situation kicks in, it will hurt all over again.

 

I think there is nothing wrong with being friends with an ex, but after only a month, I dont think enough time has passed.

 

And as a general rule of thumb, I think just the fact that you are in here asking whether or not its a good idea to contact her means its probably too soon.

[fiddie]

Yeah I agree with all of you, I've decided against it for now. Thanks for the help.

[catcountry]

^^^^^^^ I must agree with Mustachio. I believe it is way too soon. IMO...give yourself at least 6 months.

[Injured Lion]

Contacting her too soon will only hurt you. Weigh out the pros versus cons.