Not sure what to think....

[gaz728]

My girlfriend and I have been together for a year and we live together. She is 21 and I am 19. She has been diagnosed with a thyroid problem so she has a low sex drive and a very low energy level. I am very sympathetic to this and I try to take care of her the best I can. I am almost always stressed over money. She doesn't work and easily could, even a part time job would make a big difference. Whenever I bring up the idea of her getting a job, she immediately goes off like a rocket and won't even talk to me about it. She hardly ever wants sex and this is very hard for me at my age, especially being as stressed as I am. I am very very attracted to her and always have been, but I am starting to feel like she is not attracted to me at all. She doesn't even want to kiss me sometimes. I love her more than anything in the world. She is really all I have.

Last night she caught me masturbating to some internet porn. She got very very angry with me and now she is saying she wants to leave me or stay with me but have sex with someone else on the side... she says it is up to me. I know what I did was wrong and I did not want to hurt her feelings. I wasn't thinking clearly at the time.

Things haven't always been this way. I want it to be like it was before. What should I do?

[Serendipity1607307077]

She got very very angry with me and now she is saying she wants to leave me or stay with me but have sex with someone else on the side... she says it is up to me.

 

Was she talking about her having someone on the side or you having someone on the side??

 

Regardless of this, your gf shouldn't be thinking of only herself in this situation. She has to remember that she has you to think about as well..

 

My bf doesn't have a very good sex drive either as he has been on medication that restricts him from being randy... However, he doesn't completely shut me out of everything.

 

I think you need to sit down and have a talk with her about this. Tell her that you understand what she needs, but in return, she also has to understand what you need...

[peanut15]

You said she has been diagnosed with a thyroid problem...right? Do you know if its hypo or hyper-thyroidism? I ask because my mom was diagnosed with hypo and my mother in law has hyper (Graves Disease) so I guess I know a little about it. From what you say it seems as though she has hypo. Anyway, her thyroid problem may be a big cause of her actions and attitude. Her problem may cause her to become depressed like and it may make her over react to some situations. Hopefully she is on medication for it and over time it may help her even out her emotions. As for her sex drive, depressive like behavior can have an affect on it.

 

That 's jus my two cents on the situations but of course I do not know the entire story. With my mom we delicately try to address her behavior towards us as many times she tends of overact and throw fits at us. She never was like this before and we also noticed that when she stopped taking her thyroid medicine, she got that way.

[american dream]

DUMP HER NOW. All the signs are there that she is taking advantage of you. She is not working and leeching off of you. She blows up when you ask her to get a job to help out. She doesn't want to have sex (big warning sign). She had a completely rediculous request when you she caught you doing your thing (you are a 19 year old guy for gods sake, what does she expect, a monk??). She is lucky I wasn't there to hear that kind of request. Her next request would have been for an ambulance. LOL.

 

Anyway, this chick seems like waaaaayyyyy more trouble than she is worth. I know you think she is all you have, but hey buddy, you are paying for her in every respect.

 

GET OUT NOW WHILE YOU CAN!

[gaz728]

She was talking about herself having someone on the side (we talked this out, no longer a problem, she admitted she overreacted but she was still hurt) and she does have hypothyroidism, and because of our income we can't afford the medicine she needs (and there's a huge wait to go to the doctor too, but we'll have insurance next month).

I tell her that we just flat out cannot live on my salary alone (and it's true, we can't). We are always having to ask our parents for money for gas and food and stuff like that, there have been days when I haven't been able to get to work because I've been out of gas and can't find a ride. Her mom usually helps us out when we need it, but I feel really bad asking her for money all the time. I say that things would be a lot easier even if she would just get a part time job or something, it doesn't have to be anything demanding or hard work or anything like that. She immediately gets pissed and won't talk to me about it, or just yells I'M DOING THE BEST I CAN OK? WHY DO YOU KEEP ON AT ME ABOUT IT?

I say, because we have no money and it's putting me under a lot of stress.

She always finds some excuse... it took me 2 days of job searching to find my job and I actually like it.

[JonnyG]

Like the guy above said, I do fear shes leeching off u. Why does she expect u to do all the work and her do nothing?

 

Not only that but she doesnt seem interested in you, and is now asking if she can have sex on the side .

 

I seriously think u need to do some serious thinking. She doesnt sound like the right girl to be with.

[hardcore]

hey i have been throw this befor . so lose her run and don't look back trust me eather that or you are in for a world of hurt. do you have somewere to stay . i know moey can be hard to get a plase or maybe you should just stay away for a littel bit let her find out what life is like with out you around to pay her bill's 8) ok thats it

[Mike_Wazowski]

Bro...She doesn't work right? So I assume that you are paying ALL the rent right?

 

So what she wants is to live with you rent free and Knock Da Boots with another guy on top of that?

 

 

Dude all I can say is Make sure she doesn't crack her head on the door while you are kicking her dumb azz out!

[mamamaria]

theres nothin wrong with looking at porn..or masturbating..everyone does it. i think maybe and i dont mean to be harsh but maybe she doesnt respect or love you..she doesnt appreciate what you do for her..she wont help you make your life easier(get a job), and then she catches you jerkin off and wants to break up or have sex with someone else...i thought her sex drive was low? bull. you deserve more and you need to realize that fast. relationships are mutual. and she is not all you have..your job?your friends? hobbies or anything to make you happy or have fun? ...this website...you need to move on fast cause you deserve a lot more but youll only get what you think you deseerve so start thinking better of yourself..your great!