communication issue and learning a new language

[deafgirl]

Hi,

 

Well as you guess my screen name and what i could be possibly talking about. I am Deaf and use both oral and sign language as my way of communicating. Recently i have had this situation with guys who are not Deaf and going out. I went out with this guy recently and he said he want to learn a new language and would love to learn sign language.

 

Anyway after he didn't get what he wanted and knew that all i was giving was a kiss. a few days later i get this ridiculous email from him saying he is afraid to go physical with me and don't want to make another mistake. He also says no point in taking it slow and being friends kind of thing. He furthur stated he is not ready to learn a new language. Now i didn't meet this guy at a bar or online, etc. i meet him in person so he knew just what he was up for. I don't play games and i made it clear that i am Deaf and use sign language even though my speech is somewhat clear.

 

I have explained to him my position in the email, that is, i rather not make yet another stupid mistake by having a one night stand and then realizing i am only interested in being friends. I went into alot of detail explaining my reasons and i am not rejecting him, i enjoy being out with him but not ready to go that far. so far no response from him after this email.

 

I AM CONFUSED! can someone help out with this? it is mind boggling to me as to exactly what is he trying to say? would any man learn a new language for someone he is really interesed in?

 

should i just ignore him completely and say "to hell with this one, move on" or what?

 

Any feedback or help would be great.

Thanks

[mercurydreams]

If you were in love I would say chances are that he was actually wanting to learn sign language, but since it was just a few dates I think that he was just trying to get some. Guys will say anything to impress you if they think it helps their chances.

[ComputerGuy]

should i just ignore him completely and say "to hell with this one, move on" or what?

 

Yes you should. Stuff him, find someone who is willing to put in the effort to make it work.

[HummingBird]

Hi deafgirl,

 

Men should always respect a woman's choice in the level of physical intimacy she's comfortable with. This guy may only be interested in you sexually. Or he was genuinely interested in you but felt rejected after you refused to get intimate. If he was the former, praise yourself for not giving in to a jerk like that. If he was the latter, it shows that he doesn't know how to respect your choice. Either way, this is not the type of guy you want to start a relationship with. So yes, ignore him and move on!