in contact with the ex this Christmas

[number1]

Hi there,

 

I bumped into my ex's mum last week which was nice. We are all family friends, so I have known her for quite some time. I didn't bring anything up from the past and didn't mention my ex, but her mum wanted to tell me the situation. I don't want to go into too much detail as I respect my ex private life and don't want to go posting it on the internet, even if this is anonymously. Somebody who my ex was fond of did something v bad to her when she was younger. Ever since, she can't handle it when she gets close to somebody and grows fond of them. So it is bitter sweet that the moment she fell for me big time, was the same time she couldn't handle it and is afraid to get hurt again. In the past she has always chosen s*** boyfriends, mainly because when it goes wrong she expects it, won't get hurt and can handle it and doesn't care about them.

 

A bit of a double edged sword. It is nice to know I didn't do anything wrong but at the same time that is why it has been difficult on me also.

 

We haven't spoken to ex each in three months now. Yesterday we texted each other for xmas and she said some nice things, called me darling etc etc etc. By the time it was the evening I told her I missed her. I haven't sent a text like that since we broke up, trying to move on. But last night I did cave in. For the last few years I have lived on the other side of the world from the rest of my family, so Christmas isn't easy being the only one (obviously spent xmas with very good friends, but this time of the year nothing replaces family). As strong willed as I have been, I just couldn't help myself. I got an answer back this morning saying she misses me too and need to catch up more in the new year.

 

I have no idea what to do. I would be my usual self if we caught up and I know it would we would have great fun and lovely to see her again. I have never come accross as needy and wouldn't fall apart in front of somebody either. But is this a smart thing to meet up with each other?

[Minnie Mouse]

I broke contact with my ex today too and I was wondering how many other people have here, it's easy to cave in over christmas I think

He broke contact with me first, I sent him a card in the post to say happy christmas, I didn't receive a card from him and he didn't thank me, I thought he never wanted to speak to me again, then this morning he sent me a sweet message on facebook and I cried with relief though I am actually the dumper and I broke up with him about a month ago

I had been moving on okay though but I wrote back then he wrote back and we wrote a few messages

I kinda felt better moving on, I still had some feelings for him remaining - not so sure that you should meet up, it may have just been the woes of being apart at christmas that led to the contact, that's what I'm thinking - I would think about it carefully but I wish you the best of luck if you wish to reconcile, since this does sound positive anyway - happy xmas

[number1]

positve, perhaps but my view would be biased so I can't judge. honestly...... I would absolutely love to reconcile. But the usual optimist in me isn't there this time. I am being more of a pessimist, probably because I don't want to get my hopes up