Back after 12 months to tell my story!

[Superman87]

Well, well, well...things have changed a little around here since my last visit!

 

Just to give you a brief recap of my situation;

 

I had been with my ex-girlfriend since school (so since we were both 16 really), everything seemed to going well, I thought I would probably end up staying with this girl for the rest of my life. By March 2009 we were both now 21 and had been together 5 years and so decided we both wanted to buy our first house together. We found the house we wanted and for the next 5 months worked day and night, spending every penny we had on refurbishing the property. Around September 2009 the house was looking good and we were close to moving in. Then in October 2009 she started to act strange and arguments begun, even though she loved me she wasnt in love with me and she wanted to end the relationship.

 

Needless to say I was heartbroken. For those reading this who have just split from your partners, I feel your pain, I really do. I havent experienced feelings like it before, it was my first split and everything just felt raw. I couldnt eat, sleep or even move from the sofa. Nothing interested me, apart from enotalone. I would spend hours upon hours searching through the various forums looking for answers, reasons and even hope that I could get her back. I felt like nobody in the world was more perfect for me than my ex, how wrong I was.

 

Immediately after the split I read about No Contact and followed it religiously, it was possibly one of the most difficult things I have ever done. I dont advocate the use of NC as a tool to win back your ex-partner, but I do think it helps massively in getting over them. I had no contact initially for 5 weeks before she started sending texts out, I responded but minimally. Christmas & New Year passed and as hard as it was, I stayed strong and continued to move forward. Then in January 2010, she dropped a big bombshell by phoning me and confessing her love for me, what a huge mistake she had made etc. Reluctantly I agreed to meet her for a drink, despite wanting to believe something was there, looking back at it now it just wasnt. We both agreed we would meet up again that week as things went well, but we never did meet.

 

The house we owned was put up for sale in March and sold in September 2010. During this time, we never spoke apart from dealing with estate agents, paying bills etc.

 

Now for the best part...

 

After our meet in January 2010 and our failed plans to meet again, I decided I had to move on. I stopped visiting this site as I genuinely though it was holding me back, started socialising more than I ever had, worked hard in the gym and purchased lots of new clothes. I was beginning to feel like I'd never felt before, free and alive. I had spent all my time since leaving school in a relationship, I had never been single, I'd done all the things young single people do. I went out every weekend, whilst at the beginning I was nervous to chat to girls, after a while it became so easy and I loved the attention I received. Me and my friends would go out on Friday & Saturday nights, meet girls, take them back to ourplace and I am sure you can imagine everything else that happened. I loved it.

 

During this time I totally forgot about the ex, I was in love with my new life and it felt great. After a few months, I met my ex girlfriends auntie in a bar, she came over for a chat and couldnt stop looking at me, throwing compliments from every direction "you look amazing", "have you been working out" etc all of this just made me feel even better.

 

Anyway, in June 2010 I went on a stag do holiday with a group of lads I'd recently met. Bearing in mind I'd never been single during a lads holiday I had the time of my life. It was literally story book stuff, meeting Swedish girls and going back to their parents private villa. Honestly, as I tell these stories now I find it hard to believe they really happened. Needless to say it was an amazing holiday and one that was about to change my life in such an unexpected way.

 

For those of you who have hung out with lads, you will know the type of conversation that goes on, particularly amoungst lads who both have sisters of a similar age to us. As I hadnt known these lads long, I didnt know everything about them. One day by the pool there was a little banter about how good looking each others sisters were. I asked one of the lads about his sister as I wasnt aware he even had one. He told me bits etc and that was that. We continued with our holiday and had a truly fantastic time.

 

Anyway, a week or so later I turned up to the evening reception of the wedding and met the lads there. It was here for the first time I was introduced to my friends sister who we had briefly previously spoken about whilst on holiday. She was stunning, absolutely gorgeous. We spoke a fair bit throughout the night and even had a little dance, although we didnt swap numbers (it was hard with it being my mates sister etc) we did add each other on facebook. I remember going home and not shutting up about her, I even went into work on the Monday and told my work colleagues I'd met my future wife. A bit strong dont you think for a girl who I hadnt even taken on a date let alone got her number?

 

After a couple of days we did infact exchange numbers and text a little until I finally asked her out on a date. Without a word of a lie, I thought wow she is perfect. Beautiful, funny, caring, considerate, bubbly. Our first date went amazingly well, it felt as we had been together years? Thats how comfortable we were together. So, a few dates came and went and everything was just amazing. One night we were lay there and I told her that I was exclusive to her and wasnt interested in anyone else, and she said the same.

 

All this happened in June 2010, by October 2010 we both decided we wanted to move forward with our relationship and find a house together. So we searched and found the perfect house. We paid our deposit and moved in the beginning of November. We've been moved in now 3 weeks or so and everything is just as perfect as it was the night we first met.

 

My new girlfriend really is everything I ever wanted and will ever want from a partner. We are both perfect together.

 

One of the major points I want to make though, is that me nor my girlfriend were looking for a partner. I was loving single life and as my Mum often reminds me now, literally a week before I met my girlfriend I said "I'm loving this single life and want to stay like this for at least another year" she told me you cant plan things like this and when you meet the right girl, you'll know. How true she was.

 

For all those people out there who are starting to heal and get over the break up of a relationship, I'm not here to lie and tell you it is easy. It really isnt, its so so so difficult. But there is always a silver lining. I fell back in love with my self, which was key to my healing. I look back at my previous relationship now and realise how wrong it all was. I wasnt happy. I wasnt my own person and I guess I didnt truly love her?

 

So after 9 months of feeling like my whole world had fallen apart and there being no hope for me in the future, I had suddenly met the girl of dreams. I know for a fact I will marry this girl and we will have children.

 

I can honestly put my hand on my heart and say I have never been as happy in my life.

[AwdreeHpburn]

Superman, this is an awesome story and I am very happy for you! I wish you both the best. Thanks for sharing this - Its good to hear someone came back for reasons of success.

 

Good for you!

[DN]

Great story - I hope things continue as well for the future.

[RobD70]

This is what people need to hear.

 

People spend so much time and energy trying to get back with someone that dumped them when there could be someone much more better suited for them right around the corner.

 

You will always find someone else, always.

[coolchick64]

This is what people need to hear.

 

People spend so much time and energy trying to get back with someone that dumped them when there could be someone much more better suited for them right around the corner.

 

You will always find someone else, always.

 

 

I agree and I know we'll all be fine, but I hate to think it'll be true for my ex. Could he really find someone else better than I am? Impossible! ; )

 

p.s. thanks for the inspirational post Superman

[SparklyBoots]

That is an awesome story...wishing you continued happiness and thanks for the inspriation to us all!