This break up is hard to take, I'm not sure what to do

[banditt]

Hi everyone. I'd like to say before I get into this long explanation that I checked this site out a few days ago, and MAN, do I wish I found it the hour after we broke up. This is my nightmare:

 

My girlfriend Pam (age 21 ) and I (age 28 ) have been dating for 6 years now. It has had its ups and downs, but we loved each other deeply. I lived with her the first 2 year of out relationship, then moved 600 miles away to take a job there for 2 years. It was hard being that far apart, but I came and seen her every weekend, or she'd come see me. Then I moved a little closer, now I'm 250 miles away, and in the same Province. I've been here for 2 years now, and have been trying to get back to her but the jobs in my field are scarce there. About 2 months ago, she left me. She handed me a note saying that she didn't want to be with me anymore, that she wanted to be independend for awhile. I chased her down that night after clearing my head. Talking with her, I was told she still loved me very much, but she just wanted to experience independance. I really didn't want to lose her, I love her so much, and I came up with this stuipd idea that we could still see each other but have no commintments with each other (more or less sex, and to have her near me) I was fine with this cause she told me she wanted to come back to me, but needed time. She really convinced me that it was true. Well, about a month ago I found out (she told me) that she was sleeping with other ppl, and she was just having sex for the fun of it. I found out that she slept with a married man, and a few more ppl, and she works with all these guys. I can't be mad, cause we're not dating anymore, and there is not commitments between us (but we do have and agreement that when we are with someone eles we must ware protection during sex, we can't get into any relationships, no I love you to other people), but this was still hurting me. I tried playing mind games with her, trying to get her back. It has been three months now, and hoping she would come back to me by now. But I'm afraid she's just having to much FUN. It was just the other day I found out about NO CONTACT. So when she phoned me collect the other day, I refused it. (hoping she'd try again). It has been 4 days, and I haven't heard from her yet, and its driving me insane. I know she's out camping right now with all her MEN co-workers, and doesn't want to think about me right now.

 

Now I don't know if I did the right thing by hanging up on her the other night, I really want to know if I ticked her off, or if its bothering her the at all.

 

Is it possible just to SLEEP around and still want to get back with someone later down the road?

 

Could anyone eles here handle there ex sleeping around, and you waiting for them to come back?

 

Has anyone here done what she has done, and went back to thier ex after? Was it the relationship better afterwards?

 

I really really really really really want her back. I don't know what to do.

[Serendipity1607307077]

If it was a separation, as it seems that you have, I don't think I would be able to handle it. Sure, if you both went your separate ways without any intentions to get back together, I think that's fine, but if you are intending to hook up again, then no, I don't see it as very fair.