I need some opinions plz

[ang3l2004]

Ok so here it goes I started no contact,But he still does not call me how long do you have to do no contact normaly?I mean I understand it is to heal yourself but the thing is I am healing,I also understand that by not calling him it gives him time to miss me but yet no call I dont get it can someone please explain to me,After a long term relationship and broken up for mabe 3 months dont you think that is enough time,I just started doing no contact I have tryed it b4 didnt last long but now im doing it,I dont want to give up on him because I do love him very much,When do men start to open there eyes and realize what they had is good?I feel that if I stop calling him that it will be out of sight out of mind,I dont know if any of you can understand that but its hard I would say,I am not as upset as I was yet I do miss him,Can someone please reply to this and tell me there input opinions or own experience thanks

[Beec]

I don't see NC as a way to bring someone back, especially when they ended it. They ended it for a reason, and unless they see it as a stupid reason and are ready to admit that, why would NC bring them back.

 

Sometimes, sometimes it can. But really what brings them back is what they are missing, not the lack of any contact. They want what they once had and no longer do.

 

If you are healed and ready to have contact, maybe you should create some and remind him of what he had and no longer does.

 

If you read some of my other posts or IM me, I would be happy to give you soem more of my views.

[bbkay]

When someone really has no feeling with you. How do you expect he/she will come back to you.

NC workable or not is depend on why he/she wants to break up with you. If he/she fall in love with someone else, and lost the spark with you. Do you think he/she can pull out from the "someone" and get back to you? They never understand the dumpee's feeling because they only know what can make them feel happy. If this is your case, please let go and you keep move on. Breaking up is just temporary not used to it. Time will heal.

NC is workable if there are no third party involves. Just my personal opinion.

[skynet74]

I have mixed feeling about No Contact. I tried it for three weeks and didn't feel it got me anywhere. When I communicated with my ex again, she was no different. Just as cold as ever. I think No Contact can definitely make you miss someone. But it needs to be done until the Ex calls you. For some people that may be one or two weeks. For others it may take months and months. Every situation is different. But DO NOT cave in and call. No Contact is only successful if they call you!

 

However there is the out of sight out of mind thing that I worried about when doing No Contact. Will the EX forget about me if they don't hear from me. Well I guarantee you that your EX will never forget about you. So No Contact can work. But making your Ex feel good can also work. Talk to them on their level. Don't argue. Take full blame for the failure of the relationship. Just agree with what they say. This makes them lower their defenses so maybe you can get some answers regarding where you went wrong.

 

Love isn't an easy game. So many different appraoches and sometimes none of them seem to work. All you can do is try to act the way you did in the beginning and hope that this reminds your Ex of the person they originally fell in love with.

 

Good Luck.

 

 

John

[Ated]

I agree with skynet74.

 

Yeah! good post!

[lunatic]

Ang3l,

 

We have talked about this situation and I have told you that it may take time for him to realize that he let a good one get away. This does not happen over night and as Skynet (great post by the way) said

 

 

For some people that may be one or two weeks. For others it may take months and months. Every situation is different. But DO NOT cave in and call. No Contact is only successful if they call you!

 

Is exactly where you are right now. Be strong and stand your ground with no contact. If you really want him back you have to let him miss you. By contacting him in anyway will push him further and further away from you. Not to mention any chances you have of getting him back.

 

Be strong and Read you PM if you need to talk to me!

 

Hubman