Just getting it out

[anggrace]

Im 7 1/2 months pregnant. Haven't felt the usual emotional side effects of it and have actually impressed myself with how I've kept it together, for the most part. But along with the soon to be new and anticipated son, there are "adjustments" we're facing. For my husband especially. We're both doing our best and I think he's amazing.

 

I feel like I've been holding all this weight up for some time now and handling it pretty well. But now Im not feeling as strong. I try to stay positive, I know things will work themselves out, but it's such a roller coaster. There's just so much going on and I can't afford to fail. Not having the option to fail can feel claustrophobic. Sometimes it scares me.

 

I take good care of myself physically, which I know makes me feel better emotionally, Im surrounded by a people who love me, and I regularly practice my art. But Im feeling like I need more emotional strength right now. Or maybe I should just accept that Im going to feel weak from time to time, have a good cry and keep moving forward.

[Xylitol]

You can't constantly keep tensing a bow, otherwhise the string will break. And the whole 'i cannot fail' is just non-sense , you are just kidding yourself. You are looking at faillure in a wrong way, faillures are valuable learning moments that can make you become stronger. Now indeed failing all the time wouldn't be such a good thing , but putting up uneccessary obligations and demanding unreasonable things from yourself isn't a good thing either. Grace, no pne asked you to put the entire world up on your shoulder, sure a kid is a great responsibility, but the expectations that you are expecting from yourself are just ludicurous. Blessed the person who expects nothing, for they will not be dissapointing, the whole lesson that needs to be learned about failing isn't so much the failing itself, but rather how to stand up and move on after falling. So i indeed think that the latter( crying then moving on) is better then bottling all your emotions up. Emotions aren't to be bottled up,as an artist you know they are to be expressed, people who bottle up their emotions are like a hot tea kettle , if the pressure cannot escape they will explode, to little pressure and nothing gets done, but when its in the middle and can blow off some steam it will be alright.