BF obsessed with squirting

[xxcdxx]

So my boyfriend and I have been together about 8 months now. We are both 22, just graduated college and going to law school together in September. We are very compatible and very much in love. We're moving in together soon....we talk about getting married, etc...pretty much the sickening adorable perfect couple.

 

However, he is obsessed with watching girls squirt. Sometimes when I leave my lap top at his place, I'll come back to see that he was watching squirting porn..tons of it. I'm totally fine with porn and all, but what I don't like is the fact I can't squirt. It makes me feel like I'm not like his dream girl or something I don't know...

 

He will ask ask he gets me off if I squirted, he will talk dirty during sex and want me to squirt, he said that's his like ultimate fantasy is girls squirting....

 

I've told him before many times how it makes me feel kind of bad because I just wish I could do something I can't. I've tried giving the example of like how would it make him feel if I had a fetish for like a 12 incher or something....just feelings of inadequacy I guess. He says he loves me exactly the way I am and that I'm being silly...he reminds me that it's just porn stars doing what they do best...

 

So what do y'all think? Is this just his thing that gets him going and I should ignore it? Should I try to squirt/ I don't necessarily want him to stop watching porn...it's just I wish he was watching something that was a little more in line with my "talents" if you know what I mean.

 

This is by no means a deal breaker or anything for me, I just want to know if I'm being overly sensitive.

 

Thoughts?

[foxbat74]

IMO you are not being overly sensitive and unfortunately you are dealing with addiction/obsession. It is up to you how you want to deal with, but obviously he is hooked up to the idea. Porn, asking questions - doesn't look healthy to me. And "suppressed" obsession is a recipe for a trouble.

[Ebrithil]

I wouldnt think too much of it people have fantasys and they usualy change as time goes on, everyone has a little somthing they would like their partner to do diffrent or somthing along those lines but it doesnt mean anything if you cant, instead of dwelling on it put it out of your mind and see if you can introduce him to a new fantasy maybe one of yours.

[Shallow]

I just want to know if I'm being overly sensitive.

 

I think it's him being too insensitive. He has a bit of a fetish, which is normal, however there's no excuse for continuing to make you feel anxious about it.

 

I'm not saying you have to cater to him, but maybe there are other things you can do together that would be mutually satisfying?

[LightbulbSun]

Plenty of guys have squirting fetishes, however his seems to be taking up most of his time. You are not overreacting; this is the first step before a guy's eyes wanders somewhere else.

 

Maybe you should try to find something to distract him from his fetish, as Shallow has said. If he can't get over it, it's not a fetish, it's an obsession.

[Sunny1607307996]

Plenty of guys have squirting fetishes, however his seems to be taking up most of his time. You are not overreacting; this is the first step before a guy's eyes wanders somewhere else.

 

Maybe you should try to find something to distract him from his fetish, as Shallow has said. If he can't get over it, it's not a fetish, it's an obsession.

 

I agree. It's irrational and detrimental for him to expect you to do something in bed you physically cannot do...It's like if he had an obsession with DD breasts and you had an A cup and he wanted you to get surgery...He needs to accept you and your sexual limitations. He's making you feel in adequate about something you'll never be able to fix (and honestly, if you were a squirter, all this pressure to squirt would make it very very difficult anyway).

 

I think it's time for a talk outside the bed room about his habits and expectations.

 

And honestly, I don't have a problem with porn but I think he's leaving porn on your computer intentionally so you'll "get the idea". I don't know if he needs a refresher course in female anatomy or manners but his behavior has got to stop.

[Kumatora]

He will ask ask he gets me off if I squirted, he will talk dirty during sex and want me to squirt, he said that's his like ultimate fantasy is girls squirting....

No offense, but your guy does not know how female bodies work.

 

1. I read in a medical journal (forget the name) that less than 30% women are capable of "squirting." Not everyone can do it, so don't feel bad

 

2. You may also want to inform your boyfriend that most pornographic scenes that involve "squirting" are completely staged. With today's technology, making special effects in adult movies is very easy that even amateurs are able to pull it off and make it look real. Porn film makers would put stuff in vaginas or anuses that makes women look like they can squirt ridiculous loads... I'm talking buckets full which is inhumanly possible. Here's a fun fact: the gross internet clip floating around, 2 girls and 1 cup, was completely FAKE (sorry I can't describe in full detail without getting into trouble here).

 

So... have a sit down chat with your guy. Explain that him sharing his porn addiction and sexual fantasies with you is very inappropriate to the relationship, and that he needs to distinguish what is fake and real in adult movies. Just tell him how you feel about it like you told us here. You just can't trust everything on the internet to be real.

[muchacha_abril]

This is the problem with porn and the easy access to porn. I'm not a moralist, but I do think porn has distorted how we view sex. Now everyone wants big boobs, a brazilian wax and apparently...being able to squirt! Most people don't realize these are actors and that a lot of porn is fake and staged.

 

It's also sad that you think that only because you can't squirt you're not the "girl of his dreams". If that's what takes your guy to fall in love with you I would start looking for someone else because that's a silly reason to love or stop loving someone.

 

But that's another thing about porn. Women believe they have to look like these scalpel-sculptured women, satisfy their men in an almost servile way and be "open minded" about being pressured into trying stuff sexually even though emotionally they might not feel comfortable. And how about your satisfaction? Does he satisfy you? Do you desire something from him that maybe he doesn't know how to give you?

[livinginsbi]

well him talking dirty and doing the 'usual' thing is not going to get you to squirt. If it is something you are interested in accomplishing, then you two should read up on it, because it's not going to just happen on it's own.

 

I don't know how anyone, medical journal, or not, can come up with a percentage of how many women are capable of squirting. I can tell you that it takes some practice to get the right sensation and the right touch.. and much easier to learn about it if you practice by yourself, and then teach him. Over time it is attained much easier than in the beginning, but that doesn't mean it will happen each and every time either.

[greywolf]

I think someone should explain to your bf that most squirting porn is fake. Personally, I wouldn't mind him watching it all the time. What would bother me, however, is him talking to me about it all the time and telling me how hot it would be if I could squirt.

[DawnT]

I understand how you feel. my boyfriend is obsessed with big boobs, and, well, I am barely a B cup. I've told him many times how insecure it makes me feel, but people have their fetishes. You can't control what turns him on, but he certainly shouldn't be pressuring you to act in that way. If he wishes to have fetishes, tell him to keep them in his porn world, not your relationship.

[geekgirl4]

It's hard to control what guys will prefer in porn so there's no point. It becomes a problem when he starts building expectations for it and puts it on a pedestal in your relationship.

[hexaemeron]

Well, I mean, he can't help what he likes anymore than you can. I don't know why this makes you insecure, because I'm sure you two have a decent sex life, at least, right?

 

He's choosing to be with you. Trust in that. This will only be a problem if you allow it to be one.

[xxcdxx]

I'm not insecure about our relationship or sex life in any way....and yes he is very satisfying to me...

 

I guess I want to clarify my main concern: it's not that he "pressures" me or even suggests that he would like it if I could squirt, it's just that I feel like he would think it was the most amazing thing ever if I could. I know that I am completely perfect in his eyes, I just think that if this is his little fetish in porn world, I want to make that happen in the real world.

 

My question is really just whether or not I should drop it? Should his liking this kind of porn upset me? Is he supposed to only enjoy watching girls that are exactly like me in every way? (

[greywolf]

Of course. I think sometimes it's the whole point. We all have fantasies that we know we'd never do, but it doesn't stop us from fantasizing about it. And would a fantasy really be fun if we could get it in real life?

[luv2bfit]

I hate to break it to your BF, but alot of the reason the woman does "squirt" is because the man has penetrated her g-spot. You can't squirt without having a g-spot orgasm! That is where the powerful rush of fluid comes from that enables the girl to squeeze her muscles down there and "squirt" the fluid from her. But it is the stimulation by the MAN, whether it be during sex or manual stimulation. The people that you see in porn doing what they do, is because they are having their g-spot stimulated during sex. That is VERY difficult to do because of the angle and many times guys don't have the "size" needed to achieve it. Manual on the other hand using 2 fingers, most guys SHOULD be able to find the g-spot. Many don't know how!

I'm 28, and as I got older and dated more experienced guys I learnt about my g-spot and what it felt to have an orgasm. My ex-fiance at the time made me "squirt" all the time.

My current bf was curious one day and asked if I had done it before? I told him I had, and he felt sooo inadequate that he couldn't make me do it.

He complained of stubby short fingers and that he couldn't "reach" my spot... I didn't break the news to him, but I knew it was because he just wasn't getting the right angle.

Finally after like 8 months, he can now do it !

I'm not sure if physically every woman can squirt... but I do know as a woman who can, I can ONLY do it with a man who knows how to hit that right spot ! So explain that to the BF and do some experimenting together!

[MarmiteCrumpet]

True dat ^^^^

[Atticus90]

Don't know if I like the idea of a women pissin on me during sex.

You're boyfriend has an addiction. You shouldn't be okay with him watching porn all the time. Eventually it'll get into the relationship like it is now and ruin it.

 

Don't get me wrong, your boyfriend sounds like a great guy and reassuring to you that he loves you for who you are and not what you can/can't do, but that porn can turn into a big problem down the road.

[MarmiteCrumpet]

Don't know if I like the idea of a women pissin on me during sex.

 

*eyeroll*

 

It is not "pissin". Please take the time to link removed before making remarks like that.