jinxremoving Posted May 12, 2010 Share Posted May 12, 2010 Ok, well me and my ex-girlfriend have been split up since the end of january (details of the break-up should be in my post history if you want the nitty gritty). Things basically ended with her wanting to remain best friends but with her "loving me but not being in love with me" ( any more. I basically ended up rejecting the idea of being friends for a while, after a brief period "in limbo". Anyway I'm now at the stage where I'm doing fine without her and happy with my life but would still be interested in reconciling. I thought it would be wise to give it a significant period of time without her in my life to 1) fully heal from the break-up and 2) see if I wanted her in my life. I've been in no contact/limited contact where possible with her - doing my best considering she only lives 2 doors away from me and the fact we share a number of close mutual friends! I've seen her out a few times - once about a month ago when we went out as a group and she singled me out and talked to me for most of the night. As it'd been a while since we'd split up nothing was especially awkward and we had a laugh. Ended up walking back to home together and she invited me in for a cup of tea (which I would have declined if I hadn't had one too many beers!). Anyway, I guess in my drunken state I kinda hoped something would happen but didn't make any moves, say anything that stupid, said my goodbyes after a bit and went home. She text me after I got home saying it was really nice to catch up blah blah etc. - I text back politely and went to bed and thought nothing more of it. Anyway, last week I went round to hang out with one of my mates who lives with her (whilst she was, by pure coincidence, out with a couple of my housemates). Sod's law, as I was leaving the house, we bumped into each other, exchanged friendly small talk and went home and thought nothing more about. Anyway, half an hour later she text me asking if I fancied catching up sometime. I said something like "yeah, we should definitely all get together (us and our friends) once exams and everything are done with!" She replied "that's not what I meant but if you change your mind, it would be nice to get coffee together". Basically, it seems she wants us to hang out, preferably. She even complained to one of my friends (who is also best mates with her) that she didn't understand why I wasn't texting her or interested in meeting up but was perfectly happy to chat to her if we ended up out together in the same place/in a group. She popped round tonight to give my housemate some post that'd accidentally been posted through their letterbox and we chatted for a while, again in the presence of other people. We had a little catch up between ourselves - all light-hearted and fun, not an ounce of awkwardness. Basically, I'm wondering what the next step is as I'm still interested in reconciling, under the right circumstances. As far as it seems to me, she isn't interested in doing so or she would have said or I'd have heard through the grapevine. I'm not deluding myself with regards to reconciliation - it's not something I'm expecting. I know she's up for hanging out with me any time, it's just my lack of interest thus far that is stopping it from happening. I'm waiting until the end of finals before I change my approach as I'm in a good place at the moment, don't have the time and don't want to jeopardise my results by hanging out with her. I'm just wanting an outsiders' perspective. Any general advice on how to proceed? (I don't want to get "friendzoned" but equally, I'm not naive enough to expect she'll just ring up begging for me back.) PS. Thanks for any replies, didn't really realise how long this had got! Link to comment
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