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I need a breakthrough.... to get this girl back!!!

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I Need to Get This Girl Back!


I'm going preclude this by saying that I've had a hard life. I've been to jail, rehab, and had a drug addiction. But.... I've now been sober for 3 years, found God, have a steady job, and am back in school. I've completely changed my life. I'm 23, and live in South Florida. Its hard for me to find a girl that is not interested in partying, drinking, and all that. But, I found her. Her name is Brooke and she made me very happy. I met Brooke 3 weeks ago at the DMV of all places. I was sitting down and she thought I was cute so she sat next to me. We started talking, I got her number, she got mine, and I left.

We've only know eachother for 3 weeks now, and became bf/gf 2 weeks after we met. We moved things very fast. She met my parents, she wanted me to meet hers. She held me on a pedestal at first, like she was lucky to have me. Then, out of the blue, she broke up with me. I am very confused, and would like Brooke back. Please read on if you want to help...



-At the beginning of each paragraph, i will state how long since we 1st met, and the events/conversation of the day..


Day 6: Our first date was at a sports bar restaurant, she picked me up (I have a suspended license from years ago) and we went out. She liked me so much she even payed for dinner (while I was in the bathroom). She dropped me off and I kissed her on the cheek. On the way home she was talking about activities shed like to do with me in the future.


Day 7: The next day she texts, "Hey i need to run to the mall tomorow, I might stop by your work." So she stops by, meets my coworkers, and we have lunch. We walked around the mall (holding hands) and she left.


Day 9: The next date we went downtown, walked around holding hands, and had coffee. Brooke was telling me things like, "I cant believe youre into me". "Youre so hot, you probably usually date much hotter girls than me." ... she was obviously really into me. Later we went to the beach and made out, felt eachother up, etc., then she dropped me at home.


Day 10: The next day, she's texting me saying she wants me to meet her Mom because her mom wants to know who she is hanging out with at night. I say "ok". then she says "i didnt want to scare you away by saying that." but i was ok with it.


Day 12: The third date, I went bowling with her, her brother, and her best friend. It went well. Afterwards she dropped me off at home. By this point we're making out regularly.


Day 16: The next date, we see a movie, then i say i have a surprise for her. so, we drive to the beach. i lay out a blanket, take out massage oil, and tell her i will give u a massage. we didnt get to the massage. we fooled around, cuddled, and talked for 3 hours on that blanket on the beach. then i asked her, "i want you to be my girlfriend." she said, "im not supposed to have one. im in nursing school, i wont have much time for you." so i say, "im not that kind of boyfriend. you still have ur life, and i have mine, but we have a new separate one together." then she said, "ok". by the end of that night, we were on the ground at the beach cuddling, and she said "i dont want to let you go"


Day 17: the next day, we were texting back and forth, and i was talking sort of mushy for my usual self, saying things like, "i want to hold you, kiss you", blah blah. and she was saying, "omg you drive me crazy. whenever i think of you i get butterflies." at this point im thinking, "hmm, this is great. shes really into me!" shes calling me baby, and im calling her babe at this point.


Day 18: she stops by my work, we walk around the mall holding hands, we make out in her car, everythings normal. she texts me later, "it was nice seeing you. you looked so handsome in your work clothes. but id rather you in nothing of you know what i mean". i text back, "remember that time downtown when we were walking and i grabbed you and kissed you, and you said, "that was nice". she texts back, "that was so romantic, like it was in a movie. you make me smile so much!!!"


Day 19: we're supposed to hang out today, so i tell her i cant wait to see her. she says the same. later that night, she texts me and says "i cant hang out tonight, my mom want me to spend time with her" So i call her, ask what shes going to be doing with her mom, tell her to say hi for me, and thats it.



Day 20: Here are the texts we exchanged.


Me- "good morning sleepy head. have a great day. i get off work at 5 if you want to chill"

Brooke-"I have to babysit at 4. its easy money so i have to do it. i hope youre not mad"

Me "of course im not mad. i know you want to see me. maybe i can come over to where you're babysitting."

Brooke- "i cant have guys over here, lol"

Me- "sure you can"

Brooke- "im not going to ask. shell get mad"

Me-"youre such a goody-two-shoes. noooo, "i dont want to ask cause she might get mad", lol. JK, but when do I get to see my new girlfriend?"

Brooke- "John, lately I've been thinking we rushed into the whole boyfriend girlfriend title. I feel like I dont even know you that well.


(at this point im freaking, thinking that if i pretend i dont care, she'll change her



Me- "Ok. lets just be good friends then"

Brooke- "Okay"

Me- "I feel like we kind of rushed too, but i also think we had a connection early on. I usually didnt talk this mushy to past girlfriends, but you were receptive"

Brooke- "Receptive?"

Me- "Meaning you liked it. But whatever, its cool."

Brooke- "I did like it. I just dont think Im ready for a relationship right now. I'm sorry."

Me- "Dont worry about it. Bye Jen. I have to get back to work"

Brooke- "Bye"


At this point I'm confused as hell. How does someone go from "having butterflies" when they think about you, to wanting to end it? On the other hand, I have no idea if she wanted to end it all, or go back to dating but just remove the bf/gf title.


Day 24: I havent heard from her in 4 days, so I figure Ill get advice from a friend who is good with girls. i send the following texts per his advice:


Me- "So this is how its gonna be?"

Brooke- "Im sorry"

Me- "I'm sorry? Does that mean thats it?"

(No reply for 30 minutes)

Me- "???"

(No reply for an hour now)

Me- "Just let me know if you want me to leave you alone, or can we talk?"

Brooke- "I'm with my family on vacation. I can't talk anymore"

Me- "I get the picture. Too bad... Peace! It was nice knowing you"


Day 25: Thats today. I want her back and I dont know what to do. Did I piss her off when I made fun about the babysitting? Did I show too much interest and she lost attraction? I know I sound really gay right now, but I am really a nice, honest guy, and would really appreciate some guidance people. Whats my next move, how long should I wait?

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To be honest, I think you should back away and give her space. It looks and sounds like maybe Brooke became a little frightened with how fast things were moving once she got past the "heat of the moment". Or, it could be family pressure, or class pressure.


If she does talk to you, and she probably might if she still cares about you, talk about why she feels the way she does, and how you can solve that, whether by being just friends, or dating without official titles, or whatever you may find. Addtionally, this is just my opinion, but try not to take anymore advice from your friend, what he told you to say most likely came off as confrontational to her, hence her not wanting to talk. Hope this helps, I understand exactly how you are feeling, I was in the same boat at one point.

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Unfortunately you cannot make someone like you, no matter how well you click with them or how perfect you feel you are together. I think it's weird how she flipped on you like that honestly, and that leads me to question her more than you really.


She gave you all the signals for a go, then kind of left you hanging there. I personally don't think that's very nice behavior on her part, and whether or not she meant to come off that way - bottom line is to me, she sounds like the kind of girls I would tell my guy friends not to go after.


You're a nice guy, and I'm sorry she's suddenly became so distant but perhaps she really didn't know she wasn't that into you. I don't know, this is my personal opinion from my personal perspective. I know that when I met my man and we hit it off like crazy (regardless of how quickly) I really, really, really liked him. And I told him so, it was very much how you described the beginning with you two; I know if I didn't like him, I wouldn't have gotten to that point of flirting or spending that much quality time at all.


It's just weird, I think there's some missing pieces here on her end.


But good luck and good job with how you've been doing. Don't let this get you down. Some girls are just in it for attention, some don't like to divulge why they suddenly aren't interested, some are fickle... but they're not all like that

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yea... I don't think she is into all of this that much. She might have liked you but you don't know what her life backstory is, maybe there is an ex in the picture, or somebody else...there can always be other factors that tie it in.... Girls are usually more receptive of a relationship than guys and get less "freaked"....so I would assume that something else is an issue there.....look for the factor x.

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