Can't seem to trust people.

[DanDee]

As long as I can remember, I've always had a deep fear of most people... a mistrust if you will. As if anyone I come in contact with is inherently horrible, selfish and will automatically talk about me behind my back. Paranoia maybe.

 

Who knows where it came from because I've never been bullied or anything like that. I did grown up with an absent father which possibly has something to do with it... Anyway this does affect me massively though because I try to avoid talking to anyone new, and be very judgemental to avoid possibly being judged... "he/she looks b*tchy, I'll stay away from them".

 

Is this normal?! I mean, I think most people are weary of others to some degree but this is a whole other level.

 

Edit - thought I would give an example of how much it affects me. It's always been a dream of mine to teach English in Japan or Thailand however this would involve working and living with strangers. (Kids are fine - I don't fear them) but it's the adults I'm worried about. Just scared that they're going to dislike me and not be very decent people.

[Shallow]

Is this normal?! I mean, I think most people are weary of others to some degree but this is a whole other level.

It's not normal, but you're not alone (see what I did there?). If this condition (which sounds like it could be Avoidant or Anxious Personality Disorder) is crippling your ability to work and/or socialize, you should see a professional for diagnosis/therapy. I have AvPD myself, but it doesn't affect my ability to work, so I really haven't bothered to be treated for it.

[DanDee]

It's not normal, but you're not alone (see what I did there?). If this condition (which sounds like it could be Avoidant or Anxious Personality Disorder) is crippling your ability to work and/or socialize, you should see a professional for diagnosis/therapy. I have AvPD myself, but it doesn't affect my ability to work, so I really haven't bothered to be treated for it.

 

I thought I could have APD - but is the cause of it a mistrust of people? Or just genetics? I Last year, I went to therapy for 3 months but I wasn't really getting anywhere and was getting way too expensive.

 

Oh, and I do hold down a job, and can do day-to-day things. It's just something inside... people kinda scare me! The human race is just quite a selfish, cruel thing to me a lot of the time (on to Philosophy now

[Shallow]

I thought I could have APD - but is the cause of it a mistrust of people? Or just genetics? I Last year, I went to therapy for 3 months but I wasn't really getting anywhere and was getting way too expensive.

 

Oh, and I do hold down a job, and can do day-to-day things. It's just something inside... people kinda scare me! The human race is just quite a selfish, cruel thing to me a lot of the time (on to Philosophy now

It's not a cause, it's a symptom. Same with the fear of being judged/disliked/rejected. It's very common for the cause to be the (perceived or otherwise) rejection by a parent or a loved one.

 

Personally, I find it hard to believe for anyone to not be a little misanthropic nowadays. People are garbage. However, when it causes problems with your career or social life, it's a good idea to seek some sort of professional advice. Of course, therein lies the catch-22, as it's difficult to obtain help from someone you probably aren't going to trust in the first place.

[Mauxly]

The human race is just quite a selfish, cruel thing to me a lot of the time (on to Philosophy now

 

I wish I could argue against this one.

[jul-els]

The human race is just quite a selfish, cruel thing to me a lot of the time (on to Philosophy now

 

Anyone who doesn't realize this isn't paying attention. Humans are nowhere near the pedestal we so much love to put ourselves on. I find it amusing. After all, I'm one too. Sure I have my faults, but I'm not all bad. It's very rare that anyone is. The good stuff is there if you're willing to sift through all the debris (I know it's a lot) and accept and embrace them both for what they are. Yin and Yang. Love and hate. Dark and light, etc. Can't have one without the other.