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I need closure. Wait it out?


ComeClarity

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Mx ex still has feelings for me but threw in the towel - seemingly to deal with personal issues.

 

She's 18 so I I'm also thinking she got a little freaked out by the ammount of time we were spending together.

 

Anyways, I'm wondering talking to her anonymously is an okay idea. I mean, you guys are all sorta anonymous.

 

I wanted to send her an email as to be a friend of mine. I don't want her to think that i'm "always going to be there" so I want "someone" to tell her that I'm ready to move on...so she can take hold and decide, and not just let it go until it's over.

 

Does that make any sense?

 

I want to know if anyone here has done something simillar to get the straight answers?

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No, do NOT do anonymous. Why would you want a relationship based on lies?

 

IMO, she is too young to be seriously involved, especially with a 23 year old. Give her some space. She's got a lot of maturing to do. It may not seem like it to you at your age, but trust me.

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Don't do it. That would be manipulative. If she won't talk to you, then you just have to find closure on your own. This idea that we need our exes to provide us with closure is false. Its easy to think that having the answers will make things easier, and that if you only understood the reasons they walked away then you'd be able to let go and move on. That is rarely the case.

 

Finding closure is a conscious decision you make for yourself, not something you wait for someone else to give you.

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I agree not do anything anonymously. Not right. However, the need for closure is one that you can solve for yourself. I would suggest writing a letter and not sending it. Closure is a place you get to on your own. It is a misconception that a conversation will provide closure. It usually only causes more questions left unanswered or continues the pain through the torture of the interaction or non-interaction if you don't get a response if you are secretly hoping for one. Your conclusions and journey are enough to get your closure in time. No answers you get from anyone are going to cause you to get there faster. It all takes time.......Sad but true.

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