Is she the one for me?

[HowTo]

Hi,

 

I'm sure this has been asked to DEATH on this board. I'm having doubts about my gf and I'm not sure what to do..

 

For example, lately I have been feeling somewhat detached from her and find myself wondering what it would be like to date other people and if I would be more compatible with someone else. I like to read, I like to keep track of current events.. things to keep my brain stimulated but she doesn't like doing any of those. I can't remember the last time she read a book and when I asked her about it she said she just wasn't too interested in them. The only way she hears about current events are through other people.. she never finds out herself. She graduated from University with a respectable degree so she's not completely stupid.. its just that i find that I can't have intelligent conversations with her....

 

 

What to do.. what to do...

[Cheeks18]

What is the rest of your relationship like?? Talking about current events doesnt really make or break a relationship.

[troytoburn]

Don't really know what you should do. I think my boyfriend is feeling similar about me (but for different reasons). We have a personality difference, and instead of me becoming more secure I am becoming more insecure around him because he is not very loving. I would take the high road and end it sooner rather than later... it all depends on whether you like her enough to stay.

[coyote1980]

If those traits are very important to you, and it's starting to become a big issue in you, then you know the answer.

Maybe telling her how you feel might get you somewhere....maybe she hasn't even

noticed you have issues with her.

Not every successful couple has the same interests.

[HowTo]

What is the rest of your relationship like?? Talking about current events doesnt really make or break a relationship.

 

You bring up a good point..

 

It's just that I find I can't have an intelligent conversation about anything and I used current events as an example of one area where it is lacking.

 

The relationship isn't perfect either. For example..She doesn't seem to value my opinion and seems to question everything I say. ie: I was teaching her how to play guitar and suggested she learn Musical Theory but she flat out denied needing it. Again, thats just one example.. she asks for my opinion but when I give it to her she'll argue it death (even if I have tons more experience in the area than her). As a result I have less and less patience for her which leads to more needless arguing.

 

Blah.. I'm just very frustrated overall.. We know each other very well and we've been together for quite awhile now but sometimes I can't shake the feeling that there is something better for me out there. Is this just a phase? Anyone else get this?

[Cheeks18]

Went through a similar ordeal with the ex...Though Im not crazy smart or anything sometimes her stupidity would bother me a whole bunch and I would end up upseting her and it would turn in to an argument.

 

But when I look back on when we first met she was the same way, at that time I found it cute and funny and we always laughed about it. And there are some areas that she excedes me in that I would make dumb comments or have dumb opinions.

 

I regret getting mad or looking down on her for the things she did that were stupid....Listen or read the lyrics to the song little Moments by Brad Paisley. Theres no reason ever to fret over a loved ones mistake or misfortune...Look back to what you fell in love with...See if its still there and if thats what makes you want to be with her and in love with her...If those are gone then get out...if you realize that you just need to accept her for who she is then stay with it....

 

Dont you have any friends you can have a deep talk with about current events and such??

[Cheeks18]

Here Ill make it easy!! haha.. this song sums up what Im trying to say...

 

Well I'll never forget the first time that I heard

That pretty mouth say that dirty word

And I can't even remember now what she backed my truck into

But she covered her mouth and her face got red

And she just looked so darn cute

That I couldn't even act like I was mad

Yeah I live for little moments like that

 

Well that's just like last year on my birthday

She lost all track of time and burnt the cake

And every smoke detector in the house was goin' off

And she was just about to cry until I took her in my arms

And I tried not to let her see me laugh

Yeah I live for little moments like that

 

I know she's not perfect but she tries so hard for me

And I thank god that she isn't 'cause how boring would that be

It's the little imperfections it's the sudden change in plans

When she misreads the directions and we're lost but holdin' hands

Yeah I live for little moments like that

 

When she's layin' on my shoulder on the sofa in the dark

And about the time she falls asleep so does my right arm

And I want so bad to move it 'cause it's tinglin' and it's numb

But she looks so much like an angel that I don't wanna wake her up

Yeah I live for little moments

When she steals my heart again and doesn't even know it

Yeah I live for little moments like that

[HowTo]

Thanks Cheeks. I really need to sit down and think about whether I am just nitpicking or if we're actually not compatible. We'll see what the next month or two brings.

 

You are awesome

[Cheeks18]

Thanks Cheeks. I really need to sit down and think about whether I am just nitpicking or if we're actually not compatible. We'll see what the next month or two brings.

 

You are awesome

 

Anytime...Good luck I hope all works out for ya buddy!