three months after no contact. next step possibility

[pete2002]

hi, i've posted in the past. i broke up with my gifrliend of 4 years, and then had a change of heart six months later, chased her for four months, and made a complete fool of myself. three months ago she started dating someone else, adn at that point i finally just stopped talking to her. she woudl email once a week, call saying she missed me so much, and i only once returned her weekly calls when it was because her grandmother had died. at that point she even asked if we coudl hang out more, but i told her the point of my call was to talk about her grandma, not to change how things were between us.

 

she is still dating this guy, although i have no idea how close they are.

 

she is now home for the summer from law school. so now me, her, and her new bf are all in different cities. she's called me twice from home, and i havent yet responded.

 

so here's the question. i've done a lot of growing the past three months, and have worked on myself. I know she cares a lot about me, but i also know she's dating soemoen else. but i want to konw, at this point, can i fight for her? Can i do something to sweep her off her feet, and try to see if we can try to work things out

 

my plan is this.. to send her a care package (something she loves so much and woudl make her so happy when we dated). ive already bought most of the things to put in it, all very presonalizd, all took so much thought, all will make her really happy/sad at the same time. in the care package i will include a note that tells here where im at, and asks her if she wants to try to even see if there is anythign between us, i will come visit her accross the country during my two weeks off from medical school, and we will see how things are... if she wants nothing to do wtih this offer, then she shoudl just say no..

 

i think this is obviously dumb and scary in many ways, but in a way its good. either we try, or i stop holding on to this hope that i still for some stupid reason have in my head, only because she keeps calling me and telling me she misses me so much that it hurts. but i know that doesnt really mean anything, but still, i think it makes me hold on, so maybe this will be finality. but do you guys think this has any chance of working? do you think this will hurt me a lot?

 

THANKS SO MUCH

 

pete

[yasmina]

Well it sounds as though you have made a decision in your mind and are waiting for somebody to tell you to go ahead with it....best advice i could ever give you..go with your instincts...if it feels 'right' to send the care package...and try to make ammends..then do it...if you have any hesitation then maybe you should wait...and you also have to ask yourself...why didnt she want to make ammends for so long..went out and started a new relationship..obviously not in the right frame of mind...and now wants to try things with you again...it seems like a recipe for disaster...as tempting as it is to go back..really feel that its right first...if it is it will work out..if its not...then we are all here to help you through...

 

goodluck...