Long Distance Break Up

[tylercdurden2004]

I just broke up with my girlfriend of one year a few days ago. First off to explain a little background. I have been travelling for the 2 1/2 years and I met my girlfriend in SCotland. She is from Germany and I am Canadian. We lived (not together) in Edinburgh for two months before she went back to Germany. I stay in SCotland and she came to visit after one month. I then went to see her a month and a half later and continued to travel for 2 months. I then wnet back and we spent 2 weeks together before I went away for a week and came back to spend 2 weeks over Christmas with her and her family. I then came back to Canada and 2 months later she came to stay for one month. Its been a month later and we broke up. The reason she gave me is that she is unsure about her feelings about a friend who goes to the same university as her and who told her he likes her more than a friend. He has been going through a tough time with a serious family illness. A week ago (after he told her his feelings)she phoned me and was upset because she didnt feel the same as him but then the other day when we talked I asked what was going on because I noticed we werent communicating like we normally do this week. She told me she was unsure of her feelings for him because she hasnt seen him this week and noticed she was missing him. I was planning on goign toher in 3 weeks time for a 21/2 week visit before heading off to Australia and to travel Asia for a year. I had hoped we would be able to continue our visits as we have. But she doesnt feel that we will be able to as was one of her other reasons. We communicate very well with each other and are totally comfortable being with each other no matter what we do, even if we are doing nothing it still fun for us to be around each other. She has just started university in October 2003 and she is 21 year old I am 27 years old and already finished university. I love her so much more than anything and cant stand to lose her. Its come as some surprise because there have been no problems to this point and we have sent each other letters, emails, phone calls 3 times a week telling each other how much we love and care for each other. But I know the distance is hard. What do you think and what should I do from this point. I have found the last few days I went from thinking "oh my god what am I going to do we had planned stuff for the future" to missing specific moments. Now for the pst day I find I am not really thinking about specific moments we shared but thinking about her all the time, in a more general way. I find I am missing her not really the moments we shared. Is this normal what does this mean? Another thing I am unsure of is the no contact deal. We havent communicated in the last 5 days and I know we need time apart to heal and to understand how we truly feel but I am not too sure if I should make the first move, give her space etc. I wrote her a long email the day after and just told her my thoughts and basically said no matter what I will still be cheering her on etc. It was a nice email and I closed it by saying that I had no expectations of her to write me back etc. I really feel empty without her in my life and I have been through breakups before and realized in the end that all along there were issues. With us ther wasnt any so it makes closure that much harder.

[uongy]

first off,id like to say that i know what your going through as i also fell in love with a girl long distance and it really hurt.

 

i understand that there are no issues but it may be that she missed you too much when you were not with her that it hurt.that was the case with my ex and thats why she broke up with me.

 

as to what to do,just take time out and heal.do things you enjoy and dont stress over things that are not particularly important.

 

hope ive given you some food for thought.