My ex girlfriend is lonely

[LifeGoesOn09]

God I feel so bad for her. I really really do. I'm sad I can't be the one. I've seen her on off but I know its just painful for me. I feel so guilty.

 

Last night she put on her fb "oh god I feel so lonely". She's a great girl so why can't I have the feelings I want!!! Pxxsed off!!!

[arwen]

That's very painful, you don't have the right feelings, but obviously you care about her. Honestly, I think you're the last person who can really help her. This is a bit she needs to do on her own - probably she's sad after the break up, and needs to figure out how to put her own life back together. Unless she has really indicated that she wants to be friends and you're sure she wants nothing more than that, I think it's best to leave her alone. Maybe for yourself, it's better to not check her facebook (you don't need to remove her, but you can change in your settings that you don't see her statuses in your newsfeed).

[HouseKitten]

When me and my ex split up, he put one fb status up about 'packing up his life' and it made me feel terrible, so I rang him and asked him if we could keep it off facebook. He agreed and my god did it help. My guilt was already massive, I didn't need his roaring and loneliness to add to it.

 

There's a block option on facebook so you can avoid seeing updates from certain people. This would probably be a good idea for you. She's entitled to mourn, but you don't have to bear witness to it.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

She is entitled to put whatever she wants on her FB..it is her account to do as she wishes and if she chooses to pour out her heart on it there is nothing you can do to prevent her from doing that...she has a right to grieve in her own way. What you can do, however, is not check up on her FB and not be in contact with her so that she can move on. If you treated her respectfully and with compassion throughout the relationship and when you broke up with her, then you have nothing to feel guilty about just because you don't have feelings for her in a romantic way. It happens. You sound like a compassionate person and that is a good thing. There are too many dumpers who run roughshod over the person they are dumping and feel no guilt at all...it is refreshing to see that there are those who feel compassion.

[DN]

I agree that the best thing you can do is not look at her facebook - it that is one way she uses to help herself then she should do so providing she is not telling lies about you.

[LifeGoesOn09]

Yeah, we had a great relationship and a totally amicable split. I wish I could still be with her and the temptation to see her sometimes is strong but I can't keep her up which is what would happen.

 

Doesn't help the fact that I've lost my swagger a little bit at the moment so struggling to get some new girl situations. I don't lack confidence to approach new girls but I'm in my head too much and that's screwing me up a bit at the mo which is quite annoying otherwise I'd probably have had a fair few dates by now.

 

Anyways that aside I know I have a girl who cares deeply for me and loves me. Its just very sad we can't be together ... almost tragic.