Today is the worst day in awhile

[Nappyloxs]

Today is terrible. We broke up about 2 months ago. It was out of nowhere. Just a big fight when both of us said very hurtful things.

 

She has not spoken to me since, except to get her things. I have made too many attempts to contact her; emails, text, phone calls. No response to anything.

 

I miss her so much and love her so much.

 

I have realized so much in the last two months. When I lost a piece of her, that I was making the relationship boring, that I forgot how to love her and that love takes effort. Along with so much more.

 

I looked on her FB account. Right now, she lives with a person who hates me (and interferes with others relationship on multiple occasions). I know my ex. isn't dating anyone else. I found out she is going to a matchmaking event tomorrow (I promise I am not going, checking her facebook makes me a stalker).

 

I just miss and love her so much that it is killing (plus its not good that it is affecting my work). I know if she would just respond, we could get back together.

 

Everyone tells me to move on, even my family who loved her has not change and said she wasn't right for me for various reasons. I know her friends and family are telling her the same thing. But still, I know what we had was so special. Its wasn't perfect by any means. But it was so special.

 

Before we broke up, I was stressed about work all the time and it affected our relationship. I did not realize that then. But without her, I am just unhappy. Even something good happens, I will be happy for a while but then I just want to share them with her. Then I get unhappy.

[zinny]

It's an emotional roller coaster and I think we all know now that there will be good days and then unbelievable gut wrenching ones. But all you can do at this time is focus on that fact that hopefully with time.... the bad ones will eventually disappear.

 

I can't give advice to stop the hurt or the pain you are going through, so I just wanted to extend my support to help you get through it.....

[Nappyloxs]

Thanks:

 

It was hell. I actually had to leave work for a few hours (luckily I am my own boss). While at home, I was able to clear my mind. I am done. I am moving forward. I let this breakup take too much control over me. I let someone who does not want me have control over me without even saying a word.

 

I think this may be the turning point. (knock on wood). I am so disappointed in myself that I let this breakup affect my work (I deal with other peoples problems for a living). I let it get to me in the middle of the day. At night is one thing, but in the middle of the day is not good.

 

I just hope this really is the turning point.

[zinny]

It is hell.... I have become a mess at work too... over the past couple of months, my work has suffered... and it shows... just another added stress to an already messed up life

 

I understand where you are.... I'm there too... and just like you said, it's time to move forward and stop letting the break-up control you. Unfortunately it's easier said then done and all I can do is take it one day at a time.

[heartbroken100]

Thanks:

 

It was hell. I actually had to leave work for a few hours (luckily I am my own boss). While at home, I was able to clear my mind. I am done. I am moving forward. I let this breakup take too much control over me. I let someone who does not want me have control over me without even saying a word.

 

I think this may be the turning point. (knock on wood). I am so disappointed in myself that I let this breakup affect my work (I deal with other peoples problems for a living). I let it get to me in the middle of the day. At night is one thing, but in the middle of the day is not good.

 

I just hope this really is the turning point.

I'm sorry you had such a bad day! I am in the first day of NC myself after being broken up for almost 2 months. He immediately started dating someone else but still contacted me everyday. I finally put my foot down and told him that he can't have his cake and eat it too. It didnt seem to bother him in the least when I told him I didnt want to talk anymore.

 

I hope this is the turning point for you and that you get better every day. It will take time but little by little you will heal and be able to get some perspective on things.

[Nappyloxs]

Heartbroken: Glad to hear that you put your foot down. You made the right choice. I can tell you from past experience (not with this ex) that he is just trying to have his cake and eat it too. You know about the other girl, but it is doubtful that she knows he still talked to you. So congrats it is exactly like you said it just takes time.

 

I think it is the turning point. We'll see but today was a great day!!! Still thought of her coming back. But I know its not going to happen and I cannot wait for her. I joined some groups that I found on link removed. Mostly because I just need to start meeting new people and getting out more. I am not looking for a new woman, though it would probably help. All my friends are in relationships and I don't feel like being the single guy. Rather just meet hang out with other singles. I know I am not ready to date anyway. Right now I just want every day to be about ME. I want to be selfish!!!