mca1975 Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Hello, I just need to rant. I feel so depressed today. I can feel that horrible depressive feeling deep down, its scaring me as I have not felt this low for some time now. I think its a mixture of all that has happened recently. I have trouble with relationships anyway and push my boyfriend away a lot, though I am also over-analytical and obsessive about my relationship. I am very paranoid person anyway and don't trust easily. I have just moved out of my flat after living alone there for years, which was hard to do, to be with my boyfriend and then after only a month, we got bullied out of our own home by his so-called best friend (flatmate) and his girlfriend. It really affected me. We are now staying at his mum and dads and we both feel very low. We are currently saving to afford to move out, but every morning I wake up, I just feel so low as I remind myself of our circumstances. I am very tired today, got very drunk on Saturday night and also have my period. Please someone tell me this will pass....... Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 I'm just going to say it.... Stop Drinking. Period. End of tired. Link to comment
mca1975 Posted September 21, 2009 Author Share Posted September 21, 2009 Yes, I know drinking is a factor to how I feel. I don't drink an awful lot. It's the first proper drink we have had for about three weeks..... Link to comment
Lonewing Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Something you should consider; there's two types of alchoholics....those who drink far too much, and then those who rarily if ever drink. In either case, we are those people who respond poorly to drinking, and as such, we should not do it. MAYBE a glass of wine with a fancy meal. But otherwise, we are not the type of people who can socailly drink. I'm like this, my ex is like this, you;re like this... Link to comment
mca1975 Posted September 21, 2009 Author Share Posted September 21, 2009 You are right, I always feel depressed after drinking. I am fast realising that I am quite a depressive person. Have you been the same then Lonewing and cut down on the drinking? I find that I can be a binge drinker, but I dont drink as much as I used to, now I am in my relationship with my boyfriend. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Of course it will pass! Just keep plugging away at working and building up your fund so the two of you can move out. That's rough staying with the folks, but it's temporary. Just try and use that uncomfortable feeling with the situation as incentive to work even harder to set things up for the next step. And it's not fair to try and appraise things hung over and with your friend visiting. Even one of those can have me crying like a baby and feeling the world is much darker than it really is. Have a big hug and try not to worry. It's not forever. In fact, I bet in even a few days the world will look a brighter place. Emotions can be so powerful. Good thing is; you have a nice bf. Probably other good things going in your life too? Link to comment
mca1975 Posted September 21, 2009 Author Share Posted September 21, 2009 I have got good things in my life, a big supportive close family, a nice boyfriend. Never got any money though, terrible with money. I am always the type to run away from things when times get rough, but I have to stop that. My emotions rule me totally. They take me over and I wallow in them aswell. I don't know how to stop. I have had therapy, hypnotherapy, counselling, cognitive therapy... Link to comment
lavenderdove Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Go out and buy a Red Bull or take some B vitamins. Drinking depletes them, and if you are naturally depressive, you may be slightly B deficient all the time, and drinking will bring on a really bad spell. And hormone fluctuations are notorious for that. Just remind yourself that this is a funk brought on by biochemical conditions, and you'll feel better in a day or two. Your living situation is not permanent nor a cosmic judgment or sign of future doom, just one of life's irritations. Remind yourself of that, and that you have a plan that will allow you into your own place soon. Start shopping for neighborhoods you might want to live in and check out various neighborhoods and flats, so that when you are ready to move, you can be watching for a really good place somewhere you really like. If you find a building you really like, you can watch for flats to open up in that building. Even looking around and investigating alternatives can help pull you out of your funk and show you you are not powerless or doomed, just in the planning stage. Link to comment
mca1975 Posted September 21, 2009 Author Share Posted September 21, 2009 We have had to cancel two events we were looking forward to in order to afford the move. We have already been viewing lots of properties but have not found the right one yet. I am starting to feel a little better the longer the day goes on. Mornings are always worse. Is that right about Vitamin B? It has been suggested that I have some sort of imbalance that I am always struggling with. Also I do not do any exercise either. I think I need to change my life around and get active.... Link to comment
lavenderdove Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Yes, B vitamins help depression and PMS/hormonal shifts... I felt a huge difference in energy and attitude when i started taking daily vitamins that were high in B (sometimes labelled 'stress' vitamins because B helps fight the negative effects of stress on the body). Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 I'm right on board with those B vits. I take a "anti-stress" vit that has B vits, zinc, copper and vitamin E. It has vitamin C in it too. That with making myself exercise every single day - my minimum is to take a 30 min walk at the very least - makes a huge huge difference. A difference between perpetual swings and occasional rough patches. There are other elements in my bag of tricks (mostly common sense taking care of yourself and managing stress) too, but lavenderdove is giving great advice. I'm thinking I'm going to splurge on a full body massage this week and maybe that'll help me out of this ugly feeling mode I'm currently in. Changing something usually works. Link to comment
mca1975 Posted September 21, 2009 Author Share Posted September 21, 2009 Well thats really interesting, I shall look into that. I do find that I am constantly struggling to feel "normal" a lot of the time, but I know its my own negative attitide towards myself that brings it about. Work is difficult right now aswell. The lady has returned from maternity leave and my job is gone so I am now just a "floater" and feel like I have no purpose. It's important for me to feel "needed" at work or like I have a fixed role. Also I have noticed that attitudes have changed towards me at work and people that were once chatty are not chatting to me anymore, because I think they feel like they are being disloyal to the lady who has returned. It really gets to me when people change like that. I feel quite obsessed with people not liking me, I cannot stand it. I feel totally responsible for everything around me! I am like this with my partner aswell, if he is in bad mood or quiet, I instantly think its me and my mood is affected also. Link to comment
mca1975 Posted September 21, 2009 Author Share Posted September 21, 2009 I'm right on board with those B vits. I take a "anti-stress" vit that has B vits, zinc, copper and vitamin E. It has vitamin C in it too. That with making myself exercise every single day - my minimum is to take a 30 min walk at the very least - makes a huge huge difference. A difference between perpetual swings and occasional rough patches. There are other elements in my bag of tricks (mostly common sense taking care of yourself and managing stress) too, but lavenderdove is giving great advice. I'm thinking I'm going to splurge on a full body massage this week and maybe that'll help me out of this ugly feeling mode I'm currently in. Changing something usually works. I used to have massages every week, but money couldnt allow me to carry on with them. I thought they were wonderful. I am certainly going to try and make changes, as I am sick of feeling like this for most of my life. I want to have kids one day, but I feel I have too many problems to even be able to look after a child! Link to comment
liquer Posted September 21, 2009 Share Posted September 21, 2009 Hope it all works out for you MCA. Seems like you got great advice here. As always Link to comment
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